Still Clamping

I love helping Highsec miners.

I also help lowsec bears.

Kuben craved attention.

However, he had no time for poors.

Kuben wanted the boss b.

So he went to the source.

We were amazed.

Kuben is a real money man.

PLOT TWIST: Kuben is also a secret agent!

He’s watching me!

Kuben infiltrated deep inside.

I’m surrounded by traitors!

Kuben knows what I did.

The truth is out.

DOPPLE TWIST: I actually am a secret agent.

I will cut a b.

I done did it.

I have so many names.

You can’t stop any of me.

We are already closer than you realize.

It’s way too late.

In EvE Online, only one name matters.

That’s right!

Everybody knows it.

You love it.

Cheers!

I’m the Best

Hey there!

It’s always good to hear from the little people.

Today’s Simp of the Week is Milk Chocolate Vodka. Mmm, yum!

Milk is off to a good start in EvE Online.

It’s hard for me to read all my fanmail.

It’s like actually overwhelming.

Boys, if you want my attention, give me all your isk.

I’m not fucking around.

I’m the most expensive findom in the galaxy.

One way or another, you are gonna pay.

I know exactly how to treat a man.

You love it.

Anyways, my Chocolate Vodka had a frequently asked question.

Are miners human?

No.

Stupid miners!

Highsec Failures

They know where we are, and what we are doing.

However, antigankers continue to permafail.

Their time has no value. They have nothing better to do.

The old meme rings true.

It sucks to suck!

Antiganking losers can’t stop us.

We will never ever stop.

The Highsec Failteam won’t save you.

There is only one way to stay SAFE.

You must obey the LAW.

Windowlickers can’t protect your freight.

Cheers!

Ganker of the Year

I’m pleased to announce our annual Ganker of the Year contest has ended. This year’s Ganker of the Year is me, cool! The runner up is whomsoever killed the most Ventures during the contest. Congratulations to Aveve Olerie, who killed eighty, and has therefore been proclaimed the second fourth best Ganker of the Year!

Aveve won 4 billion isk! WoW!

UPDATE: As per the following, I have been correctly awarded the top three placings, which moves Aveve into fourth.

Here is a handy chart:

1st Place: Aiko
2nd Place: Aiko
3rd Place: Aiko
Other Places: IDC w/e