ag Dummydumreee


I always think, ya know, I got other things I’d rather do than play EvE Online, or write about it… but then I log in, and encounter the incredible stupidity of Idiocracy Online.

Previously, I discussed how incompetent antigankers continually fail, whilst roleplaying success. It’s never clear what they accomplished, but they sure as hell didn’t stop any gankers.

Recently, we spotted Highsec Plebtards camping Juunigashi with Stormbringers, desperately hoping to sperg lightning bolts in a windowlicking attempt to save a freighter.

The obvious solution was to warp into Uedama (with the dummydumdums following like Keystone Cops), as we then warped into Ikao, and back into Juunigashi to kill the target.

I could not conceal my contempt.

I honestly question the time I’ve invested in EvE, but at least I’m going down in history as the all time greatest. However, how does one justify investing even more time (years more than me), and yet failing to come close? It’s like, when you are slamming homeruns out of the stadium, how can you possibly have respect for a permapleb who is drunk on antifreeze and all-you-can-eat chilidogs?

Running a bunch of alts is bad enough, but imagine running a bunch of alts and failing to accomplish anything!

Apparently, some people refer to their alts as “we”.

The antiganker posed an interesting question…

I once heard of a turboautist, who wasted years following Jason, Joe/Bob, Aussie, brainlet, Benji, loyal/Trump, etc.

This goblok would always believe he saved a freighter, proudly proclaiming, “Freighter saaaaaaaaved.”

I simply cannot stand a stupid man.

However, did “we” save the freighter?

Apparently not!

Suddenly, the loser didn’t want to gloat.

Eventually, he showed the true nature of the whiteknight.

I believe him.

I’m cute!

Quitting EvE, Goodbye

Miners ask silly questions.

What do you think?

V3rbal also wanted his ship back.

He’s just a 2009 newbro.

With years of experience, he tried a little trick.

It’s the ol “gimme my ship back” scam.

We did our best to help him out.

It’s always a pleasure to help newbros.

Another happy customer.

I hope he enjoyed his space adventure.

Game Over.

A Brief History of CODE.

The once mighty CODE. alliance had terminal autism.

Literally, autism.

NOL Director Super Perforator was unwell.

Super declared war on Aiko!

He roleplayed “victory”.

Victorious gankers should stop ganking. Right?

Super Perfie had no time for gankers.

Perfie preferred antigankers.

However, a princess cannot abide antigankers…

So Super Perforator ban/muted all the gankers.

Perfie was seduced by antiganker “agent” Knowledgeminer

Fortunately, Aiko has powerful friends in Highsec.

Knowledgeminer was arrested!

However, Super Perforator continued to harbor antigankers.

Meanwhile, Perfie autistically denied the death of James 315.

Inevitably, The Conference Elite denounced New Order Logistics.

Everyone said NOL is trash.

So TCE decided to form a new alliance, without NOL.

Stay tuned for a brief history of the CODE. alliance.

To be continued…

Bee well.

Still Clamping

I love helping Highsec miners.

I also help lowsec bears.

Kuben craved attention.

However, he had no time for poors.

Kuben wanted the boss b.

So he went to the source.

We were amazed.

Kuben is a real money man.

PLOT TWIST: Kuben is also a secret agent!

He’s watching me!

Kuben infiltrated deep inside.

I’m surrounded by traitors!

Kuben knows what I did.

The truth is out.

DOPPLE TWIST: I actually am a secret agent.

I will cut a b.

I done did it.

I have so many names.

You can’t stop any of me.

We are already closer than you realize.

It’s way too late.

In EvE Online, only one name matters.

That’s right!

Everybody knows it.

You love it.


I’m the Best

Hey there!

It’s always good to hear from the little people.

Today’s Simp of the Week is Milk Chocolate Vodka. Mmm, yum!

Milk is off to a good start in EvE Online.

It’s hard for me to read all my fanmail.

It’s like actually overwhelming.

Boys, if you want my attention, give me all your isk.

I’m not fucking around.

I’m the most expensive findom in the galaxy.

One way or another, you are gonna pay.

I know exactly how to treat a man.

You love it.

Anyways, my Chocolate Vodka had a frequently asked question.

Are miners human?


Stupid miners!