Hedvard Gets Owned

Hedvard Vetranax met his fate and destiny.

…and they said I never leave Highsec?

I know what men really want.

To Princess Aiko, Keeper of the Drones
From: Hedvard Vetranax

They want to write poems (about me).

Princess Aiko, jewel of the Chain,
I’ve chased through fire, through void, through flame.
I’ve broken pirates, kings, and fleets,
Yet found defeat where our destinies meet.

The whispers say I threw the fight,
That somehow I forgot my might.
They ask, “Why didn’t the Astero burn?
Why let the heatless modules turn?”

The answer’s simple—though hard to confess,
A deputy can falter, I guess.
When your ship appeared upon my scan,
My courage fled my careful plan.

My heat racks waited, cold and still,
Unused by choice, not lack of will.
The overheat lights never shone…
For fear I’d leave you podded… alone.

What glory lies in molten steel,
If victory ends what I might feel?
Better an honest bruise to pride
Than scorch the star where hopes reside.

Yet let no soul mistake the tale—
Your victory was no fairy tale.
Those faithful drones obeyed your hand
Like knights responding to command.

They struck with grace, returned with speed,
Each recall timed to meet the need.
No drone was wasted, left to die;
You ruled the field with watchful eye.

I watched them weave through fire and smoke,
Each perfect orbit, every stroke.
A captain’s worth is plainly shown;
By how she guides each faithful drone.

So if they ask why heat was spared,
Or why my armor wasn’t repaired,
Tell them this, and tell it true:

A deputy may hunt the stars…

But even Bulldogs lose their nerve…

When fighting someone worthy of their heart.

Until the next duel beneath Anoikis’ endless skies!

Maybe he should make this into a song?

What a good little boy.

Yes, there’s more!

…but why did he set me to red standing?

Hedvard Vetranax > girls make me nervous

You know what I really like?

Songs about me…

I’m the star!


Now, Hedvard just needs to send isk (and lots of it).

Goddess Aiko

My name is Aiko Danuja.

Everybody thinks I’m great.

Objectively, I’m the best player in the history of EvE Online.

I was voted “coolest hottest best of the best”!

I also made an elite top tier PvP alliance!

That’s right.

Just read these customer testimonials!

That’s right!

Many miners purchase multiple permits!

I think it’s kinda funny…

o7 capsuleers!

Happy Aiko Day

We interrupt our regularly scheduled content to bring you a post of supreme importance.

Everybody loves Aiko.

People are starting to understand.

I’m the best!

That’s right.

So today, we celebrate Aiko Day.

Everybody is feeling that Aiko spirit.

It’s a real holiday.

On the first Aiko Day, I declared war upon the Minnies.

By the second Aiko Day, I had my first nightmare!

James 315 subsequently declared this to be a state holiday.

He used this time to reflect upon the future of warfare.

As a prophet of Aiko, James foresaw the future.

This was a rather long essay…

Some people say James liked to get really high.

I certainly do!

Well, that concludes our Aiko Day festivities.

That’s right!

AFK FOREVER

Here’s a little secret about EvE Online.

Not everybody plays the game.

Miners have better things to do.

They would rather play a different game.

Sometimes they are in the kitchen…

…or the little miner’s room.

Frequently, they are asleep.

They are literally away from their keyboard.

Are they even trying?

Silly bears…

Better luck next time!

That’s right.

That’s right!

o7 capsuleers…

=KILL OF THE WEEK=

Nice job James ‘315’ Fuchs!

Are we the Gankers?

Over the years, I have received many questions…

…and more than a few complaints!

Are people in my alliance ganking?

I thought we were antigankers???

I’m not sure what to say.

It is rather strange…

I wonder if the miners will ever understand?

Am I still getting these mails?

Yep!

It’s a real mystery!

That’s right.

That’s right!

Antiganker PRIDE!

o7 capsuleers!

=BONUS CONTENT=