Janeway’s Revenge

Big Strong alliance is a little weak.

So they deployed their chief antiganker.

Captain Janeway practiced her craft in local chat.

Meanwhile, I was busy next door.

I came back to listen.

The miners supposedly had guns.

I don’t mind if they wait.

Silly miners!

This went on for awhile.

Janeway had a message for me.

It was a mystery message.

What a real pleb.

Carebear Citizen

Star Citizen is full of carebears.

Is fun a mental illness?

Reddit investigates…

Are you proud to mine salt tears?

Boredom is the antidote to fun!

Open PvP is a gateway to griefplay!

W0mbat got 17 downvotes…

Meanwhile, Nexx0ir invented in-game prisons.

This is a popular idea!

Scannaer vowed to griev the grievers.

PvP players are fundamentally toxic.

Gankhobos are bad at “real” PvP.

Remember the CODE?

Real PvPers travel for at least an hour…

Gankers just want easy kills at the grocery store.

Non-profit PvP is mere fun.

Cheerzah!

Quitters

Miners are quitters…

…crybabies…

…whiners…

Basically, miners are losers.

Will they ever accept reality?

Doubt!

Meanwhile, the ISD has a new policy…

As part of their effort to eliminate all discussion in the forums, they have begun enforcing a new rule.

All PvP, including ganking, is officially consensual! Anyone who says otherwise is a troll.

Cheerzah!

UedamaScout BANNED

UedamaScout advertises 24/7 activity.

That’s a lot of activity!

I first reported Jim over a year ago.

It was fairly obvious that Jim is a botter, because he scrolled up and down in local chat, all day long, day after day… and yet he did not answer convo requests from Taint Licker, even when those unopened messages were obscuring Jim’s broadcast. Obviously, if Jim were actually at his computer, he might pause for a moment in his ceaseless scrolling, in order to accept or reject the conversation. Instead, he would run multiple accounts, endlessly undocking pods and warping them to the same locations, over and over, almost exactly as if he were botting.

I didn’t think CCP would do anything.

According to one source, CCP devs do not see bots as a problem. The real problem, according to this perspective, is that players believe bots are a problem. CCP is supposedly gaslighting us, pretending the problem does not really exist – when we know better.

Indeed, for over a year, this bot botted endlessly, using his Twitch account to broadcast 24/7 automated ‘intel’.

Today I received eleven thank yous.

I’ve only reported one person.

So I checked his stream, where he was doing an automated giveaway…

Uh, that looks like a ban… Yes, he kept streaming while banned, almost like he wasn’t at his computer!

I am pleased to see that he was advertising this blog, when he finally encountered justice.

Cheerzah!

==BONUS CONTENT==

Although his alts are banned, Jim remains…

…for how long?

Double cheerzah!

Haha.

Death of an antiganker, Part 2

Listening to: Haunt

Yesterday, we announced the death of Bloody Bear.

Today, he came to grips with reality.

He will never defeat me.

So he sent a video instead.

Army roleplay makes miners feel big.

He also linked another cringe video.

Five years ago, he supposedly defeated Zaenis Desef.

Is he actually a threat to anyone?

He added some bluster…

…and concluded with a message to gankers.

The videos made him feel like a man again.

What a silly bear!

I’ll haunt your nightmares
Little did you know that I like fear
When you jump, I’ll be right there
You should be afraid, you should be scared

Out of the darkness, out of the fear
It’s too late, I’m here now
I hope that you’re prepared, ’cause there’s no getting out


Don’t cross me or you’ll learn quick
The hard way that I’m not one to mess with
I got a mind full of mean tricks

You’re all alone, you’re on your own
It’s you and me, who’s going home?
Welcome to an in-game nightmare


A succubus preys on the weak
You better watch out for me
Mistakes were made, you will see
You should’ve never crossed me
Revenge is my calling

Death of an antiganker

Bloody Bear loves antiganking.

Back in the day, he even made illegal videos.

One day, justice finally caught up with him.

At first, Bloody Bear tried a bribe.

Of course, Krig had to confiscate the stolen ship.

Next, the carebear tried to buy a new ship.

This went as well as expected.

He only owed 300 million…

He only had one ship left…

So he traded his Falcon…

Thanks for the free ship, bro!

In one day, he lost all his killmarks…

However, he was already planning to get more.

What a silly bear!

Oh well…

Cheerzah!

Highsec Griefing

I try to follow the rules.

However, some people don’t play by the rules.

There are soo many griefers in EvE Online!

I call it Griefers Online.

Jason Longshot tried to stop me from playing.

OmG!

This is extortion and racketeering!

Judgment was at hand…

Why?

I needed to make money, fast!

Alas, the miners began running a train on me…

WtF!

I was banned from the outer spaces…

…as grief miners took pleasure in my emotional distress.

*BONUS CONTENT*
=BEHIND THE SCENES=

Shory wanted to bully me, away from others.

So he began dimming the gaslight.

Then he began exaggerating.

Next, came the victim blaming.

Finally, the delusions of grandeur.

Stupid miners! 🙂

Hmph!

I have 93 active killrights(((((

\\\EPILOGUE///

CABO IS BACK:)

Previously, we met CABO4EvER.

CABO4EVER > 26 days 26 days..23 days…26 days.. have the time, dont worry:) i amwatching you ALL…every step…

He has a lot of alts.

Morghana Chase > jesus it’s busy today
Mr Lexon > yes pirates mining the Ice belt
Mr Lexon > and finaly thay had a kill

CABO claimed a draw.

KINGCABO > looks like even money to me
Learza Thiesant > Calm down Miner
KINGCABO > lmao you guys are so pathetic

CABO was not upset.

CABO4EVER > up yours, i willlmao
Learza Thiesant > you’re not a nice person
CABO4EVER > YOU ARE
Mr Lexon > dont intimidate me
Mr Lexon > dont y have other to do tha kill defenless miners?
Mr Lexon > probably acording to zkillboard the only thing y god at
Mr Lexon > so there y go, pirates all of you

Although, Mr Lexon was concerned.

Mr Lexon > curent pirates in system
Mr Lexon > I recond the hole corp is pirates…
Synthale > Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Mr Lexon > yes
CABOSOLDIERS > got my rum right next to me, lmao:)
Mr Lexon > Pirates mining the ice belt
Mr Lexon > all you do is KILL defensless miners
Mr Lexon > Next time, I bring a fleet.
Mr Lexon > also you pull concord
Mr Lexon > just need a video on you doing it…
Mr Lexon > your corp not war decable… so
Mr Lexon > there is limit to what I can do…

CABO was having a good time.

CABO4EVER > LETS PLAY…:)
CABO4EVER > 11 ROCKS TO GO
KINGCABO > WANT ME GONE, THINK AGAIN..:)
KINGCABO > game on, lmao
CABO4EVER > HEHEHEHEHE
CABOSOLDIERS > LETS ROCK….:)
CABO4EVER > REMEMBER: I AM 18 HRS ONLINE A DAY, LMAO
CABO4EVER > CABO IS BACK:)

CABO IS BACK:)

KINGCABO > WHAT YOU GONA BRING NOW, LMAO
KINGCABO > FIRST CATS, THEN..WHAT WAS THE OTHER ONE?
KINGCABO > NOW THALOS…AND NEXT?
KINGCABO > LMAO..
KINGCABO > COME ON..
KINGCABO > BRING IT ON..
CABOSOLDIERS > INSTEAD OF STANDING STILL AND COMPRESS, WILL JUMP AND COMPRESS, LMAO

EvE Online is a fun game.

CABOSOLDIERS > TNX GUYS
CABOSOLDIERS > DONT NEED TO JUMP 6 9 JUMP FOR ICE
CABOSOLDIERS > hit me again so i can jump again…
CABOSOLDIERS > whoooooooaaaaaaaa
CABOSOLDIERS > i am beginning to like this game, lol
CABOSOLDIERS > hehehehehehehe
CABOSOLDIERS > YOU R KEEPING MINERS AWAY, I GET ALL BELT FOR MY SELF, LMAO
You Blew Up > i like YOU CAPS LOCK talk… its really sane of you
CABOSOLDIERS > RIGHT HERE
CABOSOLDIERS > EXACTLY, I LIKE IT BLOWED UP, LMAO
CABO4EVER > HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA

Even Mr Lexon thinks CABO is crazy.

Mr Lexon > i GES YOU USE CAPITALES BECUSE YOU HAVE PROBLEM TO READ, SO I HELP YOU WITH CAPITAL
CABOSOLDIERS > INSTEAD OF STANDING STILL AND COMPRESS, WILL JUMP AND COMPRESS, LMAO
Learza Thiesant > Its ok. Stay Calm Miner
CABO4EVER > dont think so, ganker..:)


Trun Goes Potty

Trun had to pee.

I know, cuz he told me.

Gross!

He is not a happy miner.

Trun has a potty mouth.

What a naughty little goblok.

He pled not guilty.

However, he was found guilty by a jury of his superiors.

For one thing, he is guilty of antiganking.

He’s also guilty of needing help.

What a pitiful bear.

So naturally, he had a temper tantrum.

Crazy!

Oh… he had more to say.

The phantom provision lives on!

Wow, this miner still yapping?

Miners disgust me.

He concluded by gaslighting everyone…

…and urging us to have more sex.

He also threatened to report us.

I don’t think he likes us.

What a silly!