Back to Basic

At first, Nabjorn didn’t learn his lesson.

However, he finally understands.

Nabjorn Amatin > I am quiting this game I forgot it was full of assholes congrats though on not being able to make it in the real world
Captain BeerMonster > calm down miner
Nabjorn Amatin > I have quit its ok, the gank just remined me that assholes exsist in this game as they no longer have a refuge anywhere else

Nabjorn is a born quitter.

When will CCP crack down on PvP antics?

Gankas hide behind CONCORD…

So Nabjorn vowed to go full basic.

Nobody should have fun in a video game.

Never go full basic!

Gangers just want dank exhumer scraps.

Nabjorn became a basic civilian.

He wants everyone to know!

Good luck Nabjorn!

Meanwhile, in J-space…

Neurotica 1, Part 7

Listening to: Dark Techno 2018

Neurotica 1, Part 1

Previously, Erotica 1 was permabanned.

Afterward, he developed a cunning plan.

He decided to get rich, quick.

PLOT SUMMARY: Our anti-hero, Erotica 1, permabanned from EvE Online, wipes the sweat from his brow. “Eureka!”, he exclaims whilst committing securities fraud, selling fake cryptocurrency NFTs in order to purchase CCP and unban himself. This would prove to the courts, that Erotica 1 is a successful businessman. Along the way, he planned to make a trillion isk, through a legitimate galactic bank.

As an initial first step, he exploited his own IRL infant daughter, and tried to recruit a few EvE players.

His ‘friends’ were concerned.

Surprisingly, the scam worked.

Erotica (aka Justin) sold an NFT buy-in to his first mark, rounding $5000 up to $30000, with the expectation of future profits.

This is a story of sex, crypto, federal law, and crazy.

As a woman, I often feel uppity.

Am I a space Karen…

…or a reasonably concerned citizen?

I decided not to commit securities fraud.

No thank you!

Buckle in, it’s gonna be a WILD RIDE.

If subpoenaed, I will testify in court.

To be continued…

Highsec Recruiting, Part 3

Highsec Recruiting, Part 1

Previously, newbro Mason vowed to destroy me.

This would require preparation.

Mason was excited by the thought of PvP with me.

In EvE Online, PvP is a sign of genuine affection.

Our relationship began to blossom.

However, I don’t like impudence.

Mason is a real miner.

Whereas, I am a perfect tenth-wave feminist!

Like all miners, he is a cyberbully greefer.

Fortunately, Mason began to regret his evil ways.

It was time to turn over a leaf…

My expectations were clear.

I demanded an isk sacrifice, for me.

So Mason sent his life savings.

Now I have Mason right where I want him.

He hates being told what to do…

…but now he has new friends, and a new corporation.

Everyone was impressed!

It was the start of a new era.

Mason is my miner.

I sure hope we get along!

What a good boy.

He deserves me!


Highsec Recruiting, Part 2

Highsec Recruiting, Part 1

The recruiting channel was abuzz.

I was happy to share the good news.

Bussy gankers are IN.

Eventually, a newbro contacted me.

This miner didn’t like gankers.

He wanted me to understand.

So we had a chat…

This went well.

We soon reached an understanding.

I will fight for Safety.

No miner left behind!

To be continued…


Miners are crazy people…

…in real life!


Real Talk

I like to have fun.

Recently, I reported breaking news.

Zazz is a former fan.

Remember the good old days, when Zazz still played EvE Online, after James 315 ragequit two years before?

Haha. Remember that time The Aggressor dunked James, who spent eight (8!) years writing a therapy blog, before disappearing, just like he did after his previous hobby involving… political content?

Me and James 315, we agree on politics like Ocasio-Cortez and Mitch. However, the old turtle has been dead for years. His CODE. was a tea party, astroturfed by George, which collapsed when the bubble burst. I am more sophisticated than that. By applying the principles of Hari Seldon, the Order has evolved into a grassroots autocracy.

Many battles, she emerged victorious,
Leaving her foes feeling notorious.


Bards don’t hiphop for Zazz.

James was a funny man, but I’m not.

I’m just here to help.

Some miners yearn for the old Minerbumping, with Annie Frank who on September 6, 2018, said “You did really good work. I really appreciate your new and different post. Please guys keep it up and share with us some unique post in the futureMenmy shopCar Stereo Double Din Android Player Hyepersonic Double Din Player Hyundai Creta Double Din Player CBSE open school cbse private banzaraon journeyAdj online.”

James always believed in me, even if Zazz lost faith.

I don’t think this is funny.

Who writes erotic fanfic about me and James, in the belt?

I get it… This is an ‘origin’ story.

Grrr. Hulksgarrrrr hathat. Hulkgeddon SMASH

“Praise Aiko!” is reverberated throughout the entire starbase, again and again, as the fleet takes off. Today, the miners will be hunted. Today, the miners will once again know fear.

It goes on, and reaches a happy ending.

Lonely Miner

CABO4EVER > mack, realy?

Hello CABO.

CABO4EVER > you tried to kill my mack..remember?
CABO4EVER > its high sec, mate..

CABO was pleased to collect killrights.

CABO4EVER > 26 days 26 days..23 days…26 days.. have the time, dont worry:) i amwatching you ALL…every step…
Zopiclone > activate my killright
CABO4EVER > i could be your daddy , son…
CABO4EVER > perhaps grandpa…kid..
Zopiclone > Please activate the KR on me
CABO4EVER > you wont be in a CAT, promissed..when you go BOOOOMMM! ill be camping out there when you are in your shiny BS…..KAAABBBOOOOOOMMM!1

Other miners were not impressed.

Rozo Druprime > lol he’s so stupid
Ellena Saisima > miners have no teeth so he wont actually do anything
CABO4EVER > it said i could bring friends…and thats what i am going to do.. but only when it hurts, realy hurts, lmao
Eyghynouel en Thielles > he accused me of being a “ganker” and i’ve only been playing for a week
Rozo Druprime > lol yeah he’s a retard, ignore him.
CABO4EVER > you read about those agents that can locate any player anywhere, right? and surprisely….KAAABBOOOMMM, BANG YOU R DEAD, LMAO!!!!

CABO is a lonely miner.

CABO4EVER > i have no one to talk to..cause of those filthy gankers 🙁 lets buried the axe, come harvest with me
Rozo Druprime > not even his “friends” want him in their corps. he’s looking for a new mining corp cause he got kicked out of all the other ones lol
CABO4EVER > i am a miner, not a fighter…:)

Special Time

Destiny Corrupted is bad at screenshots.

Let’s check the logs…

[01:01:52] MUHU001 > я бы тебе денег перевел 10 милиона [01:01:56] MUHU001 > дибил [01:04:08] Destiny Corrupted > Вы должны купить разрешение на перевозку [01:04:18] Destiny Corrupted > 100KK ))) [01:05:34] MUHU001 > я новенкий откуда я знаю где покупать я играю 6 день и лечу откуда начал [01:06:16] Destiny Corrupted > Ваши великие лидеры начали эту войну [01:06:35] Destiny Corrupted > Мы только защищаем себя [01:06:57] MUHU001 > меня ваша война не интересует


MUHU001 > I’m new how do I know where to buy I play 6 days and fly from where I started

MUHU was just a newbro.

MUHU001 > and what do you want me to raise money for a new powerful ship and also start fighting against you
Destiny Corrupted > A war that is going very badly for you!
MUHU001 > I’m not interested in your war

MUHU was not interested in his own wars.

Even when his alliance is the aggressor…

MUHU001 > I’m just upgrading the character
Destiny Corrupted > I’m just doing my job
MUHU001 > that’s mean

However, he vowed to fight back against meanies.

MUHU001 > I can also fly on my armagidon and destroy all passing ships and no one else will pour into your system
MUHU001 > I realized only one thing for myself, if I die, I will hunt too and 6 people can join

He promised to hunt Destiny.

MUHU001 > I repeat to you again, we are not all of us beginners on day 6, if it goes on like this, we will start hunting
MUHU001 > and our yel will not be an industry but a bounty hunt

He was serious.

MUHU001 > you are very mistaken if I bought armagidon and other beginners mind enough, believe me, I’m not a child
MUHU001 > how better to ship the ship, you would not rush to your conclusions it can become a boomerang for you

Destiny is finished!

MUHU001 > next time I’ll go there to you if I heal, I will destroy and fly not alone but in a group
MUHU001 > you finished the game
MUHU001 > and everyone will know about it you will be outcasts
MUHU001 > a squeak to you and not to seal, you can give normal people just like that

POP QUIZ: How do you say asteroid slave farmers in Russian?

Destiny Corrupted > There is no one in your “group” except asteroid slave farmers
MUHU001 > suck then silently
Destiny Corrupted > Get your whole fleet over here right now
MUHU001 > suck silently I said
MUHU001 > sheep pissed

MUHU was getting excited.

Destiny Corrupted > You talk a lot but do little
MUHU001 > talk less suck more, you will suck
Destiny Corrupted > It will be even more embarrassing when I destroy your entire fleet while I suck

It was a special time.

Destiny Corrupted > Where is the fleet?

Irbukad’s Revenge

Irbukad spotted his arch-nemesis…

Oh look, there he is!

Hahah, Irbukad wanted to grief that miner.

So Irbu contracted a bounty hunter…

How to be certain of success?

As always, payment upfront.

Hehehe, Irbukad had a funny thought…

Ok, let’s play EvE Online!

Contract accepted.


PLOT TWIST: Irbukad was just an alt.

In fact, his main controls two alts.

Another hit, on the same target.

Haha, miners never learn.

Ozran Heti Jaynara > sargon already took 750 from me
Aiko Danuja > i am not sargon
Ozran Heti Jaynara > isk after completetion
Aiko Danuja > Payment due in advance.
Ozran Heti Jaynara > not agian cant fool me twice

Challenge accepted!

Aiko Danuja > As I said
Aiko Danuja > Payment due in advance.
Ozran Heti Jaynara > well aparently when payed in advance things dont get completed
Aiko Danuja > This is not a debate. If you want me to do something, you need to pay. Complaining about someone else doesn’t convince me of anything.
Ozran Heti Jaynara > ok well dont think we are going to get an agreement the penuts are a matter of principle
Aiko Danuja > On principle, I do not work for free.

We reached an impasse.

Ozran Heti Jaynara > he will rage you will love it and you will be praised and payed
Aiko Danuja > I’ve heard that before.
Ozran Heti Jaynara > u know u want to
Aiko Danuja > I don’t know that.
Ozran Heti Jaynara > yes you do i gave 750 to sargon as a taste
Aiko Danuja > I am not Sargon.
Ozran Heti Jaynara > i tottally believe you

Fortunately, Ozran found faith.

Ozran Heti Jaynara > he just was in a troll mood he blocked and will not complete contract
Aiko Danuja > That’s your problem. I am not doing it for free.
Aiko Danuja > Why would I believe you?
Ozran Heti Jaynara > because i love you
Ozran Heti Jaynara > of coarse 🙂
Aiko Danuja > If you love me so much, you’ll pay.


Ozran Heti Jaynara > i can wait but will this be done today i like to watch 🙂
Ozran Heti Jaynara > hes still out mineing on moon
Ozran Heti Jaynara > just send mail when complete
Ozran Heti Jaynara > o/