Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Previously, Tee Ka tried Highsec PvP.
He lost a lot.
Tee Ka knows I am honest and true.
He’s like a father to me.
We often spend holidays together.
We are there for each other.
For Father’s Day, I played EvE Online with Daddy.
He doesn’t fit his ships very well.
He didn’t appreciate the surprise party.
I don’t even have a blob!!
We had a real heart to heart.
Tee Ka wants to get rich poor quick.
I invited him ganking.
That sounds fun!
His alts are excited to join.
To be continued…
In EvE Online, carebears are creepbears.
Everything has a price.
There’s only way to respond.
I sent IceyCreeper619 straight to Zboard.
Then I sent a bill, for a bill.
What a neat trick.
Get ganked, miner.
That’s right.
Every miner has a dream.
It’s always nonsense.
Don’t forget to buy your mining permits.
There are a lot of alts.
CCP thought these were new players.
Each character imbued with a unique personality.
The primary purpose of the 1000+ alts we applied into MRMNG was to send in-game corp mails.
Our alts adopted various personas. They would surface posing as concerned linemembers, newly promoted corp officers, Agents of the New Order, Metallica enthusiasts, Hapsburg princesses, marine biologists, Ryan Reynolds, chronically ill teenagers, and so on. Over 90000 corp mails were sent over the course of the campaign, which ensured uninterrupted dialogue with the other 2000 members of Mission Ready Mining (aka Fly Fearless).
Meanwhile, New Order agents ensured Safety.
Tunnel Snakes are a menace.
Fly Fearless had a Snake infestation.
Every miner needs help.
They were about to get a lot of Assistance.
However, Safety isn’t free.
Next Time, on Part 52…
We’ve killed this one before.
Like all antigankers, DKslopoke is an AFK miner.
He is a certified permapleb.
He’s not any good at EvE Online.
He merely pretends to play.
DK begs to be spoonfed.
Without gankers, there is nobody to antigank. 🙁
So he begged Wrathful Hawk to play.
The antiganker desperately waited for content.
When would Hawk find a target?
Hawk explained that antiganking is boring.
It’s only for dumbdumbs.
However, DL was daydreaming about his previous Stormbringer.
Wow, he antiganked us hard.
Good times.
I guess he had fun?
Once again, DK sat on gate, waiting for hours.
Hawk worried DK would go AFK.
The boy has a reputation.
DK drank alone, while Hawk watched two movies.
Five hours later, Hawk found a target.
Miners talk a lot.
Sometimes they want revenge.
That’s right.
We help them find a niche.
That’s right.
Read all about it!
That’s right.
It just keeps happening.
Oh look, there he is again.
What’s this?
Tee Ka keeps attacking me!
As it turns out…
That’s a fancy Orca!
Carebears think I’m just a mean greefer.
However, Tee Ka is starting to figure things out.
I’m fun.
That’s right.
He’s not a new player.
He’s just another miner.
Cheerzah!
Listening to: Miner Down
Some alliances are trash.
Some are not.
My alliance has a flagblog, with fun stories about Tee Ka’s alts.
We provide a real service for the community.
We are doing great!
Miners are so stupid, and they don’t even know it.
Fumbled? No loot? What?
No kidding.
Some carebears hide behind a good sport veneer.
I see right through that.
What would make my alliance better?
GarRrrAR Gr00)00)((()()()()N
What a game.
This is how miners die.
Some poors can’t afford mining permits.
We accept all forms of payment.
Boy that’s crazy.
EvE Online is no place for children.
Don’t let your kids become crybabies.
Safety agents are standing by.
Mine around and find out.
Here’s another zkill on demand.
It was a shame to see
It was insane, the way we’d roll
We were the big, bad pitbull
Diggin a big, black holeIt was deranged the way we’d roll
Everything around was like a little bitty town
We were the old tornadoTry to get out but we just keep stickin’ around,
‘Cause it is a very good bad thing we’ve found
I’ve got some cigarettes, I’ve got some stuff to try
We’ll play ’til we dieGonna kill you yeah
This is the private log of Captain Krig Povelli.
Recently, I came within 1,588m of a compressor.
Fleet chat was invigorating.
Suddenly, spaceships.
Plot Twist: I’m Krig Povelli.
I beat my own fleet at their own game.
There was no way to heal.
The ganker guy left no space.
This is what defeat looks like.
CONCORD just watched.
That fleet sucked.
Set up, hacked, and dunked.
Every fleet has winners and losers.
Aside from yours truly, this fleet was full of losers.
They decided to downgrade.
They also vowed revenge.
Will pirate kings save the miners?
Doubt.
I can’t wait for our next fleet!
Listening to: The Ice Pirates
I play EvE Online.
It’s like Idiocracy, in outer space.
Everyone loved the tale of Tee Ka and his alts.
Now meet Ketse…
He can transfer 60-70b!
He’s a self-proclaimed goonpirate!
What a guy.
He also steals my ice.
So I helped him stop.
He was enthusiastic.
However, he forgot about his other Mackinaws.
It was a Pirate v Pirate space battle.
I guess he’s a fan?
I think he asked me on a date.
It’s a hard knock life.
I wish Ketse all the best.
However, the feeling is not mutual.
BUSTED!
Back to low…
What a crazy miner.
What a noons!
Everybody in Delve will pay.
That’s right.
I wish I was good at this game.
At least he’s not mad.
That’s right.
At least he’s still a fan…
…but ow we are no longer frriends =((
Is this salt? 🙂
Cheerzah!
=POSTSCRIPT=
