The Exanondus, Part 6

The Exanondus, Part 1

Previously, on Aiko Danuja is the best player in EvE Online blog.

Exanon Alleile searched for a missing Mackinaw.

Eventually, he/she/xie began casting curses.

Subsequently, Damien Oxytocin encountered a raving alt.

Would Princess Aiko be able to resize these screenshots?

Someone is cursing us at length.

Will Jesus Christ travel through a wormhole and save Jita?

Suddenly, the big reveal. Irie Tsero was Exanon all along!

Your choices in EvE Online will have ETERNAL consequences.

What Would James Do?

Mission Accomplished

I have finally won EvE.

I’ll never go away, I’ll never stop, and I’ll always come back.

From the very first, I was a fan of Rooks and Kings.

A great alliance, with a great legacy.

My alliance has done more, in less time.

My name is Aiko Danuja, and I am an irl space vampire princess.

I am also the greatest capsuleer in the history of EvE Online.

James 315 was literally invincible. I took his whole alliance, the money, the fame, the glory, the praise, the isk, the blog, the house, the dog, the cats, the heroin, the killboard… I stuck my face on it, and the universe is mine.

EvE was dying (again), and I saved it (again).

Someday, they will write the history of EvE Online, and they will observe that blobber alliances were boring and dumb. The true history will be about cool alliances, filled with creative interesting people. They will talk about Shadow Cartel, Snuffed Out, Hard Knocks, Wingspan, and xqtywiznalamywmodxfhhopawzpqyjdwrpeptuaenabjawdzku. All these alliances will be a mere footnote, an introduction to the real story, which will be about the epic rise and rise of one Aiko Danuja.

You can doubt me, but just look at what I’ve done.

I am dizzy with success…

…and I’m just getting started.







You gotta pay to play.

Peace and Love

CCP wants everyone to calm down.

Everyone Gankers must remain respectful.

We must reject all forms of griefplay harassment.

It is a bannable offense to ignore a miner’s emotional distress.

Every player deserves respect.

Streamers are a privileged caste, with more rights than ordinary players.

I’m just playing an emotionless videogame.

We always treat each other with RESPECT and DIGNITY.

We must never provoke an emotional response.

I have read the secret IceCream annex to the EULA.

You can threaten to rape me in real life, it’s clearly my fault.

PvP is a violation of the EULA, because it triggers an emotional experience.

EvE is a game for peaceful AFK miners.

The player count proves that CCP knows how to develop this game!

Lampuga the Failganker

Lampuga is an expert on Highsec ganking in EvE Online.

He knows ganking is too easy.

Some people have better things to do.

For example, Lampuga prefers to fantasize about me.

However, he doesn’t want to worship me.

I’m just not good enough.

What a griefer!

That’s one strange antiganker!

What a goofus!

Eventually, Lampuga decided to show us how it is done.

Unfortunately, he tried to gank Jett Lli, and lost.

Nice try, wannabe ganker!

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #241

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #240

Yesterday was the end of an era.

Fortunately, I’ve got the awesome essentials right here.

Ganking is griefing, so I deserve abuse — right?

Awww, that’s so romantic!

Another IRL threat that CCP gameminers will blame on me.

I thought the story of Olanlee Andrews couldn’t get crazier. However, it appears GM IceCream doesn’t do basic fact checking. He sent ban warnings to people who didn’t gank Olanlee, but never bothered to check the killboard or contact anyone who was involved. I’m sorry, but that’s just lazy (and unprofessional).

Assette Pellion has a warning for Big Willies PVP Madness.

Elisabeth Canary still wants to buy those Harvester drones.

I love to help!

Camelot2010 apparently lost a ship.

7o capsuper!

Racist moon miner MOONWIBE was just roleplaying.

Plagiominer Atima Avada isn’t scared.

Sometimes my alts get emails.

Miners just want a square deal.

Are they sain or insain?

This wasn’t her first arrest…

Wutevz. Bye, ttyl.

Ok, one more.

I wonder where his ship went?

Toxic IceCream

As you already know, I am EVE’s greatest historian.

Recently, GM Senior GM IceCream accused gankers of “griefing” and “harassment”. This is the same GM who teleported his titan, to avoid a lossmail. A lot of people felt this was cheating, and it was. This is also the same GM who banned Cliff Ozuwara, wrongly asserting that pulling CONCORD is an exploit. Cliff was subsequently unbanned, but this rogue GM is still out there, trying to redefine the rules.

James 315 knew my pain. I honestly don’t know if I’m allowed to post, clip, annotate, discuss, screenshot, highlight, or paraphrase GM statements. I’ve heard multiple interpretations of the rules, all with their own supporting citations. Unfortunately, CCP is notoriously unwilling to provide clear communication.

Krig has authorized me to share his response.

Click below to expand the screenshot.

Believe it or not, but Safety. is not the only ganker guild. Another group, one I’ve never heard of, ganked a streamer without any involvement from us. Subsequently, IceCream conducted a thorough investigation, and has threatened to permanently ban “without appeal” numerous gankers (including myself). Let me be clear, I had no involvement with this gank. IceCream has even acknowledged that I was not involved. However, he is still threatening to ban me, because my “cohort” is guilty.

I conducted my own investigation. Olanlee Andrews made numerous IRL death threats, including “go light yourselves on fire, and blow your brains out” and “you deserve one in the head.” This miner stated that he understands why spree shooters kill people, and blamed gankers for triggering IRL mass shootings. I find this narrative credible, because miners frequently make such comments.

IceCream feels gankers are responsible for toxic behavior. When a ganker kills a miner, it’s apparently understandable that a miner would make IRL death threats. IceCream believes gankers should be banned, so that miners don’t have these “emotional” thoughts. IceCream stated this is not open to debate, and he will not discuss it.

IceCream is also aware that Kalvaen Voidwalker (aka Lulu) pretended to commit suicide. He knows about this, because Kalvaen is actually my alibi. At the very moment Olanlee was ganked, I was reporting Kalvaen to CCP.

Kalvaen didn’t just threaten suicide. He pretended to actually commit suicide. However, IceCream feels I had no “ingame incentive” to gank for ORE strip miners, since it’s not profitable. The only logical explanation is that I am a griefer, and I left Kalvaen with “no resort” other than fake suicide. Yes, IceCream tried to justify Kalvaen’s behaviour, and blamed me for “griefing” the Mackinaw.

When miners get upset and freak out, because they are bad at a videogame, they know that GM Icecream will always blame us. It is our fault they are having a temper tantrum. In fact, we even told them to “calm down”.

Years ago, when James 315 was bumping about, he was threatened with a ban unless he justified his activity with “miner permit roleplay”. Nowadays, we are told this does not justify ganking, but it does justify violent IRL threats.

IceCream might ban all of us, but I am telling the truth.

The Highsec mining community is toxic.

Perfect -10

Dunk Dinkle ranked his favourite EvE players.

I’m a perfect -10.

Miners are always excited to see me.

They often have questions.

I love to help!

Anthony has been a good little miner!

His alts all have mining permits.

What a happy bear!

What could possibly be wrong?

Oh, right, he still needs a fleeting permit.

Anthony just had one more question.

It would only cost 100 175 million isk to get an answer.

I’m sure he’s paid all the fees — right?

Like omg, I’m like such a cutie!