Civil War

It’s not every day that we take a step back from EvE Online, and reflect on the real world. However, Aiko has been hard at work on this film, and it’s finally landed. Wow. Well done Aiko.

Let’s see what a critic might say.

It’s a solid four, even five stars.

As a combat space blogger, this is my jam.

It was so fucking good.

That movie has great dialogue, don’t you think?

Chat let’s go!

Boy, you best be watching that movie.

I wanna see it again.


Here’s a second trailer.

Also, guess what?

Wow, some great writers out there.


Code Ready Gelhan, Part 47

Listening to: Tunnel Snakes Rule!

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 1

Mission Ready Mining (aka Fly Fearless) was not ready.

Years ago, Kalongned wrote a brief recap.

He wrote this back when I was busy euthanizing CODE.

After fleeing to Uemiseisen, the miners were still not ready.

Fortunately, an elite Assistance Group was deployed.

The AG team loves helping miners get ready!

In particular, they train miners to fight the Tunnel Snake Empire.

My alliance URL honors their experience, with a URL.

I also enjoy cybersex.

AG instructors would bump miners, during simulated Snake attacks.

Mission Ready Mining thus enjoyed a free Platinum training regimen.

This came with easy to understand audio instructions.

Miner bootcamp would continue indefinitely, and could only be terminated via payment of a modest cancellation fee.

Tunnel Snakes bump, gank, and wardec miners in Highsec. They tend to be rude to everyone, and spend much of their time cussing in local. Tunnel Snake sympathizers are also known to use vulgar language.

Meanwhile, local chat was continuously filled with fascinating factoids.

Founded in 2017, Assistance Group is a group of Trainers who are dedicated to defending Highsec. Assistance Group provides the expertise and support Highsec miners need to defend themselves against the Tunnel Snake menace.

The Tunnel Snakes have a number of corporations under their direct/indirect control. More specific intel on Tunnel Snakes and/or their affiliated organizations is only available to Class B or higher Trainers.

BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR: Individuals with the words ‘Tunnel Snake’ in player biographies, ship names, corporation names, etc. Class B and above Trainers can report Tunnel Snake activity in our invite-only intel channel.

Assistance Group’s hands on approach to training gives Highsec miners the edge they need to rid Highsec the Tunnel Snake menace. This means defeating not only the Tunnel Snakes, but their sympathizers and puppets as well.

Assistance Group Trainers provide our Highsec partners with a variety of exciting training opportunities, including: bumping, ganking, and more. This training prepares our partners for the tactics employed by our shared enemy.

Trainers work alone or in groups, Trainers can be found in icebelts and other areas designated as ‘training grids’, Not all training sessions are announced; many trainers consider any grid they occupy to be a training grid.

By November, the ‘Fly Fearless’ alliance was afraid.

In order to address this, live fire exercises began.

Many many miners were tested, and all were unready.

War was imminent!

As trainers, Kalorned and Tweeps listened to Fly Fearless comms.

This was most instructive.

To be continued…

Rebellion in Kamio

Cultural Center is a miner bumper.

100 million, or risk bump.

Muutaras urged the miners of Kamio to revolt.

Longtime readers will recall Kamio has always been uncivilized.

Muutaras vowed to devour the griefers.

He stood proudly on his soapbox.

Cultural patiently explained the law.

He also taught Muutaras some history.

Does anybody remember JTClone Ares?

Thanks for the free isk, bro!

Muutaras began brainstorming a plot.

Unfortunately, his rebel clout was diminished by his own history.

Muutaras is a graduate of the Princess Aiko School of Mining.

Even rebel leaders need a mining permit.

Muutaras made Cultural feel better.

Going South

Wormhole aficionado Stony wrote our editors.

There’s a video of Andres M Afanador?

There’s a video of him mining??

OmG! That’s him – THAT’S THE SAME GUY!



I want to be his friend, but he keeps mining.

That’s not ganking – that’s turbo crabbing!

A full decade of shameful mining.

Why Andres, why?

Years apart, me and Chance had the exact same question.

He love mined on us both.

Andres, real love doesn’t require mining.

Andres, please stop…

He loves us, but he is not loyal to us.

I hope he calms down.

That’s actually embarrassing!

On behalf all your friends, Andres, just stat some ramson.


Listening to: Democracy Manifest

Well, hello there.

One day, the ban hammer slipped.

Neffi Cake (aka Luci Gotti) got banned, permanently, maybe.

Investigative Princess Aiko investigates…

Meanwhile, ISD Redacted was summoned to space court.

Likewise, Redline doesn’t care.

The other miners accuse CCP of international crimes.

Damning chatlogs prove CCP devs are Snuffed Out alts.

Of course, they deny everything.

So Neffi banned all the CCP/Snuff devs from his discord.

Seems legit.

The truth is out there.

Is Neffi going to prison?

No, that’s Adrian Vexier…

Neffi was banned for something else.


Fortunately, Neffi has contacted a higher power.

NATO forces are on high alert.

Reddits have been reddited…

… and unreddited.

CCP fought the law, and the law won.

Snuffed Out is going to the big house.

Neffi just wants to play EvE Online.

Will Hellmar unban his biggest fan?

This is a paid advertisement…

omg he’s soooo hot

Did Neffi do anything wrong?

Regardless, Neffi will continue trying to login.

As always, Highsec gankers stand with Neffi.

We want him to undock.

Just let him play, and we will take care of him…

Save the whales!


To be continued?


Neurotica 1, Part 6

Neurotica 1, Part 1

Erotica 1 loved bonus content.

Woah… who was that girl? She seems to show up in every bonus room, like some kind of grieferette!

Anyways, utilizing my encrypted Signalbase NFT cryptoforum for Solana (which is going to the moon), Erotica’s mentor George had his assistant reach out for a friendly reunion.

After he was permabanned, Erotica had a problem.

His EvE Online activities did not look good in court.

What would FighterJets GuitarSolo do? What about Fighter Jets GuitarSolo or FighterJets Guitar Solo 1000 years?

As CEO of NFT Corporation, Erotica insisted upon doxxing himself, claiming the EvE community would defend his good reputation and high ethical standards. In fact, NFT Corporation never existed, but eventually he formed a legal illegal lawfully regulated corporation.

He also created a blog several blogs.

Exploiting international tragedy became the primary focus of his new business, capitalizing upon the NFT cryptobubble.

It’s not a scam, right?

Of course not it is!

To be continued…