Aiko Danuja Penismuncher

Antigankers are the most toxic people in the game.

High Side is a typical ‘white knight’. If I acted like him, antigankers would cry foul, claiming the moral high ground. However, you can see for yourself. Gankers are classy cats, and antigankers are bitterbear losers.

High Side’s alt is KOCMO EHOT.

They are upset, because I ganked their antiganking Talos.

Naturally, incels are enraged by my mouth.

High Side is crushing on me, and wants to pull my ponytail.

Aiko Danuja sucks dick, very cheap.
She’s a whore like her mother,
and she loves when you piss in her mouth.

He’s not wrong. I love a good time!

SLUT
SUCKING PENIS

KOCMO High Side is a bad man, in real life…

… so I sent my regards.

You might not like me, but I’m kinda like a big deal, ya know?

I get paid to do what I love.

I’m a Princess!

High Side intends to continue with his ‘campaign’.

It is obvious who hasn’t been getting any blowjobs.

Like, real talk, I only date gankers.

The Proposal

I’m the most beautiful woman in the galaxy.

I get about one marriage proposal a week.

Everybody wants to marry into power.

Of course, I’m more than just a pretty face.

Consequently, I like to define the relationship in advance.

I expect suitors to bring something to my table.

Necro was trying his best to impress.

He really needed my favour.

Unfortunately, he didn’t have anything to offer, except delusions of grandeur.

What’s in it for me?

Alas, his dreams crashed upon the hard reef of reality.

The poor guy had no chance.

A princess does not wed a peasant pretender.

At least he learned something.

True Love, Part 2

Previously, in the Princess Diaries… Jonathan found a new lady friend.

Like any self-respecting woman, Alt expected him to satisfy her.

He was a simp, but also a poor.

Alt was sorely disappointed, expressing her true feelings.

Jon was desperate to please her.

Later, he discussed the relationship with his mining bros.

He decided to show Alt that he was serious.

However, she was not impressed.

Jon needed to do more.

She demanded respect.

He was frustrated, and she was unsympathetic.

How could Jon earn her favour?

He knew what to do.

Would it work?

Alt took the money, and donated it to charity.

Jon was bankrupt, and resorted to sending love letters.

It wasn’t meant to be.

He decided to explore other opportunities.

True Love

Jonathan knows that angels are real.

Like most miners, he suffers from Dunning-Kruger syndrome.

Jon is an IRL space peasant, with low life expectancy.

Believe it or not, there are more important things than sex.

Miners need to pay rent, taxes, penalties, surcharges, and protection fees.

Jon was glad his spaceship exploded. Now he had a reason to go shopping.

Meanwhile, other miners wandered through my Why Was I Ganked? channel.

Jon began to understand the nature of industrialized griefing.

He thus felt a desire to help, but had little to offer.

He was in love, and struggled with spelling.

To be continued…

BONUS CONTENT

Watch Foo-Foo the Snoo!

This salty miner has several outbursts. Someone is MAD (and AFK)!

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OH LOOK! ASSHOLES!

OH LOOK! ASSHOLES!

OH LOOK! ASSHOLES!

OH LOOK! ASSHOLES!

He claims to be a noob, but we know the truth!

OH LOOK! ASSHOLES!

 

 

 

Stick in Space

Minastlya lost a battleship, in outer space.

His philosophy was simple. Losing is winning.

However, an investigation revealed extenuating circumstances.

Minastlya was sorely distracted.

He was responsible for his own fate.

He enjoys losing.

Gross!

Haha.

You boys need to calm down.

Eyeroll.

 

Aqss

Gosh.

Miners be misbehaving.

Just shaking my head.

You guys…

Calm down!

Let’s just be friends.

I wanna get along.

Would you like that?

Ok?

Silly miners.

I wish you all the best…

Cheers!

Haha, as if.

Bye!

|_<3\/3

Highsec is full of little surprises.

We don’t like outsiders.

We’ve established our own sovereign regime.

I’m the official head of state…

…and I’m enjoying my EVE career.

I’m good at it!

Men love their little Princess.

I mean, really, they do.

Like, really, really.

I love them too!

I give the boys a real purpose in EVE Online.

I’m just a sexy lady.

Such a good girl.

No wonder James married me…

Toodleoo!

WAR IN HIGHSEC

Aww, that’s sweet.

Oh, dear…

It’s so much easier to gank without CONCORD.

Why would you declare a Valentine’s War on me?

There’s something about me that people don’t understand.

I have a special relationship with powerful men.

It’s just that…

…well…

…I’m not who you think I am.

Sorry to disappoint.


Sun Tzu
said that you should know your enemy.

I’m kinda a big deal.

Be careful!

I’m here to help.

It’s kind of what I do.

Ya know?

History doesn’t repeat itself, but it definitely rhymes.

 

 

 

 

Psychopats

He’s lost a lot of spaceships.

Each loss triggers a fresh wave of emotional anguish.

Show some respect to me.

Don’t wind up like him.

Nobody likes a psychopats.

Honestly, there’s a lot of these guys in Highsec.

Maybe it’s just one guy, with lots of alts.

He’s bad at spelling.

He’s bad at grammar.

He kinda likes me.

Ok, he likes me a lot.

OmG, he likes me in real-life!

I know what he needs.

He’s such a bad boy.

 

 

Judhas was upset.

Judhas was upset.

He was caught.

What would his mother think?

At least, he is a happy miner.

Subnormals often act this way.

Honestly, I don’t speak Mando’ade.

I also don’t believe in the mining religions.

I just want to help the mining caste.