DemiaN is Nuts

CCP has declared war upon non-profit gankers.

Ganking is only ethical for isk/hr gankbears.

Non-profit ganking is evil.

Unfortunately, DemiaN lost a pod.

Aaaarrgg wasn’t even trying to profit…

DemiaN knows how to deal with non-profit greefers.

Killrights are a lucrative opportunity!

It’s not a sin, if you murder for money.

Just for the record, a CCP gamemaster told me that asking miners to calm down is clear evidence of griefer intent, as this phrase is deliberately and intentionally used to amplify and mock the genuine emotional distress of poor innocent Highsec miners. Oh, those precious newbros, angel DemiaN has only been playing for seven short years.

I guess even Aaaarrgg gets hit on.

Meanwhile, time was running out…

Would Aaaarrgg see what matter is?

Will we see us?

In the Far Future

Each day of reality is a full year in EvE Online. Obviously, battleships cannot repair catastrophic damage in the blink of an eye, nor can a spaceship accelerate instantaneously to velocities exceeding several thousand times the speed of light. That’s nonsense.

We experience EvE through a relativistic blur. One minute lasts six hours. Consequently, capsuleers are ancient space vampires, hundreds and even thousands of years old.

James 315 died in Poinen, on May 17, 2012. That was three thousand eight hundred and thirty-five years ago.

It’s been nearly a millenia, since we acknowledged this, with a modest funeral. Roleplayers continue to praise an absent messiah, but people without autism move on.

Meanwhile, CCP has waged a Great Crusade against non-profit ganking. Apparently, if you steal billions from a new player, that’s ok. However, if you gank a half penny Venture, then you are a born again griefer. With this in mind, for the past few years, I have been meditating in lowsec. What is the future of ganking, after CCP changes the rules?

Antigankers are so incompetent, that CCP decided to nerf bumping, increase hitpoints, remove tether, and prevent docking. However, if CCP truly doesn’t support PvP gameplay, then why bother? I’ve got better things to do, than fight carebear developers. If they really want to convert EvE into a boring AFK grind simulator, well ok!

Ever since Falcon left CCP, emergent gameplay has been nerfed and restricted. The PvP community has declined, and content has evaporated. James 315 was inspired by Falcon, but today we live in a different reality. It’s no longer the same game.

I was thinking about this last year (yesterday), when I arrived in Gamis. It was here, two thousand years ago, where Kalorned established his home. A lot of people claim James 315 loved them. However, who did James 315 actually write about?

This is for you, Kalooronded.

I made a profit, but that was never my intent.

From Derelik to Devoid

To protect new players nullsec jump freighters, the game is more tedious than ever. EvE is an incredible grind.

Recently, I patrolled the elite dangerous zone. I departed from Amphar, passing through the Abha wastes, and into the Arena.

It was completely empty, except for the Paladin in Bairshir. This miner docked up the moment I entered Sari.

Moh is nothing to write home about.

There are miners here. However, everybody is docked up. Even the Procurer in Gelhan decided to calm down.

Antiganker security forces are on high alert.

Why would a Council Diplomatic Shuttle be hiding within a debris field? Before I could investigate, it was gone.

I responded to a report of loitering.

Eleven long boring jumps.

A suspicious scene.

Another great victory!

Still Griefing

CCP wants to protect griefers.

So they released a patch to protect crabs.

CCP values their most toxic customers.

Highsec miners are truly precious.

The new rules are clear.

Antigankers are so ineffective, that CCP stepped in like the referee of a boxing match. They’ve awarded gankers a technical knockout, declaring a stoppage and an end to the carnage. This is fair, because obsessive antigankers are ruining their own lives, desperately following me around and consistently failing to stop me.

I’m having fun, and they aren’t.

So CCP changed the rules of the game.

It will be more difficult to gank newbro freighters, which are used by Highsec wardeccers and nullsec blobbears.

Antigankers thought this was a big win.

It’s the end of ganking forever!


The gankers are done, right?

I decided to investigate.

Can I still board a Catalyst?

Can I undock my Catalyst?

Well, look at that.

I didn’t even do it for profit.

No tether required!

Mad Cuz Bad

CSM Angry Mustache made a fan art.

Meanwhile, carebears are concerned.

Nova worries about noob jump freighters.

Who will save the newbros?

Nova is delusional.

We met Nova last year, at the Battle of Torrinos.

This is the ‘antiganking main’ of Everess 88.

Everess knows the current year is actually 1985.

After sending me a billion isk, Everess became a former fan.

All antigankers are like totally incompetent.

What a crazy loon!

This is clinical madness.

Thanks for the free killmail!