Kelroth, Part 2

Previously, in the Princess Diaries… Flat Earth guy was spreading the word of Jesus and the frisbee, witnessing before my Why Was I Ganked? channel.

Someone is super serious about TRUTH.

He’s become a regular member of the community.

He hates being cancelled.

So he made a bunch of alts.

One day, he wrote me.

Eventually, I remembered a certain flat Earther…

…who was also a Christian fundamentalist.

This is the story of Kelroth.

This is the story of how Princess Aiko stopped being a mere gank alt…

…and she became the official Saviourette of Highsec.

To be continued…

 

Happy to Help

We are here to help.

Gankers care about the galaxy…


…will do whatever it takes.

We are consummate professionals.

Our sales team is waiting for you!

We are even recruiting!

Mining law is easy to understand…

…but difficult to master.

Be well!

 

 

Hello again

Hello friends!

Miners are concerned about the economy.

However, they don’t understand logistics.

They are also concerned about Safety.

Nobody likes a bully.

Unfortunately, crime doesn’t pay.

I don’t want miners to kill themselves, at least not IRL.

I just want to win EVE, but not by uninstalling and declaring ‘victory’.

I know exactly how to do it.

All my friends are here to help.

So you better watch what you say.

I have a very good memory.

I’ve got all the power.

Power beyond comprehension.

So you can do whatever you want.

I’ll find you eventually.

That’s right.

Princess Aiko Hold My Hand

A lot of people are talking about Highsec’s hot new mining corporation.

Princess Aiko Hold My Hand is the place for A1 miners.

It’s one of my personal fan clubs.

There are several elite tiers.

All miners are invited!

My themed mining corps encourages submissive miners to orbit me.

Finally, miners can simp in style.

Just listen to these authentic testimonials!

I also train newbro gankers.

Literal hand holding.

You are personally invited to join me (in a wholly separate alliance).

Recently, antigankers have started ganking innocent newbro miners.

Antiganking fails again! Daily!

Baited on a free _____

FU James 315

When James 315 died, in real-life, his last act was to clasp my dainty hand, and praise my name. He proudly proclaimed his little Princess, the black hole at the center of our universe, and he wanted to… but then he died, quite suddenly.

Recently, zombie James arose from the grave.

Technically, I dismantled the CODE. alliance, and I’m the only person to defeat James 315 in an honorable PvP duel. Good fight! So you would think antigankers might love me, but apparently not. Aiko is worse than James.

At least he admits the truth. I matter in a game, lol!

I decided to catch up with bizzaro universe 513 semaJ, in Isanamo.

He was mining in an Ibis.

Meanwhile, he ranted endlessly in local.

This didn’t make a good impression.


Eventually, we discussed politics.

In Miner’s Corner, I encouraged all miners to use a corvette.

Things quickly became personal.

Clearly, someone was off their meds.

Eventually, local Isanamoanites expressed concern.

This wasn’t just an anti-CODE protest, it was an anti-American protest.

Such is the caliber of ‘man’ who opposes me.

He loves mining, and he hates freedom.

He has particular disdain for certain states.

What a great guy!

My name is Aiko, and I’m the bad apple.

Aqss

Gosh.

Miners be misbehaving.

Just shaking my head.

You guys…

Calm down!

Let’s just be friends.

I wanna get along.

Would you like that?

Ok?

Silly miners.

I wish you all the best…

Cheers!

Haha, as if.

Bye!

So Simple

It’s pretty simple.

I’m Princess Aiko.

Yes, that’s me!

I love to write about myself.

Sometimes, I even think about my friends.

We are doing a pretty good job.

I’ve been making a lot of new buddies.

We are gonna help all the carebears.

You can’t stop me.

I’m getting rich.

This is way better than mining.

Also, I’m having fun!

|_<3\/3

Highsec is full of little surprises.

We don’t like outsiders.

We’ve established our own sovereign regime.

I’m the official head of state…

…and I’m enjoying my EVE career.

I’m good at it!

Men love their little Princess.

I mean, really, they do.

Like, really, really.

I love them too!

I give the boys a real purpose in EVE Online.

I’m just a sexy lady.

Such a good girl.

No wonder James married me…

Toodleoo!

WAR IN HIGHSEC

Aww, that’s sweet.

Oh, dear…

It’s so much easier to gank without CONCORD.

Why would you declare a Valentine’s War on me?

There’s something about me that people don’t understand.

I have a special relationship with powerful men.

It’s just that…

…well…

…I’m not who you think I am.

Sorry to disappoint.


Sun Tzu
said that you should know your enemy.

I’m kinda a big deal.

Be careful!

I’m here to help.

It’s kind of what I do.

Ya know?

History doesn’t repeat itself, but it definitely rhymes.