Astero Wannabe

In EvE Online, carebears are creepbears.

Everything has a price.

There’s only way to respond.

I sent IceyCreeper619 straight to Zboard.

Then I sent a bill, for a bill.

What a neat trick.

Get ganked, miner.

That’s right.

Every miner has a dream.

It’s always nonsense.

Don’t forget to buy your mining permits.

Slowpoke Gets Poked Again

We’ve killed this one before.

Like all antigankers, DKslopoke is an AFK miner.

He is a certified permapleb.

He’s not any good at EvE Online.

He merely pretends to play.

DK begs to be spoonfed.

Without gankers, there is nobody to antigank. 🙁

So he begged Wrathful Hawk to play.

The antiganker desperately waited for content.

When would Hawk find a target?

Hawk explained that antiganking is boring.

It’s only for dumbdumbs.

However, DL was daydreaming about his previous Stormbringer.

Wow, he antiganked us hard.

Good times.

I guess he had fun?

Once again, DK sat on gate, waiting for hours.

Hawk worried DK would go AFK.

The boy has a reputation.

DK drank alone, while Hawk watched two movies.

Five hours later, Hawk found a target.

Another One

Tee Ka Gets PkD, Part 1

It just keeps happening.

Oh look, there he is again.

What’s this?

Tee Ka keeps attacking me!

As it turns out…

That’s a fancy Orca!

Carebears think I’m just a mean greefer.

However, Tee Ka is starting to figure things out.

I’m fun.

That’s right.

He’s not a new player.

He’s just another miner.

Cheerzah!

Hellform Down

Listening to: Miner Down

Some alliances are trash.

Some are not.

My alliance has a flagblog, with fun stories about Tee Ka’s alts.

We provide a real service for the community.

We are doing great!

Miners are so stupid, and they don’t even know it.

Fumbled? No loot? What?

No kidding.

Some carebears hide behind a good sport veneer.

I see right through that.

What would make my alliance better?

GarRrrAR Gr00)00)((()()()()N

What a game.

Direct to zKill

This is how miners die.

Some poors can’t afford mining permits.

We accept all forms of payment.

Boy that’s crazy.

EvE Online is no place for children.

Don’t let your kids become crybabies.

Safety agents are standing by.

Mine around and find out.

Here’s another zkill on demand.

It was a shame to see
It was insane, the way we’d roll
We were the big, bad pitbull
Diggin a big, black hole

It was deranged the way we’d roll
Everything around was like a little bitty town
We were the old tornado

Try to get out but we just keep stickin’ around,
‘Cause it is a very good bad thing we’ve found
I’ve got some cigarettes, I’ve got some stuff to try
We’ll play ’til we die

Gonna kill you yeah

Get Bumped

Before James 315 passed away…

… he taught me a neat trick.

Miners never seem to understand…

Wee! (what’s happening to me?)

Haha, gankers are so stupid, right?

Wait a minute…

What’s wrong with miners??

Like hello, you died an hour ago…

Everybody loves Gallente space.

Full speed ahead…

That’s right.

Cheerzah!