Boris Goes Bananas, Part 3

Boris Goes Bananas, Part 1

Previously, in EVE Online… a miner died (thrice).

Boris was dismayed, because his lesbian aunt is a Highsec ganker.

These are actual screenshots of EVE Online gameplay.

Like many miners, Boris doesn’t care about mining.

Losers just love to explain how they still don’t care.

I’m happy to listen.

I am Aiko, Princess of the Forest…

…and Slut of Copenhagen.

I look forward to hearing from you.

What a game…

We will get to Paradise – and you will all just die!
V.V.Putin

Boris sure trolled me.

I’m a scary girl!

Boris Goes Bananas, Part 2

Previously, in James 315 Space… Boris lost another Retriever.

:TRIGGER WARNING:
EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT (AND RACISM) IN EVE ONLINE

Aveve needs to learn how to take clear screenshots.

Doesn’t that look better?

Regardless, this is good stuff.

In EvE Online, Boris roleplays as a Christian miner.

He is persecuted, by homosexual terrorists.

Someday, if he can afford a boat, he will fight the dog fuckers.

I don’t want Boris to get banned. I find this entertaining!

Boris, you crazy Russian!

To be continued…

Nope

Yesterday, we stared into the abyss.

Was this the end of the galaxy?

Novus Ordo antigankers tried to report gankers for pulling, but the EVE community came together and defended our Highsec traditions.

All is well!

We celebrated by exploit dunking in Uedama.

Here’s a video!

In other news, an Orca had a Safety incident.

Safety inspectors are investigating.

Let’s examine the SRP request.

Ah, I found the problem…

You were trying to run your own business.

Safety first, always!

The end of zoriad

zoriad had a little problem.

His spaceship was melted, by neutron radiation.

It was a special ship, with a special purpose.

Unfortunately, he broke the law.

zoriad was dead, and it was his own fault.

Like most miners, zoriad denied his true mining nature, and insisted that he was just practicing with an exploration industrial.

Now it was time to quit the game, forever.

Like most miners, zoriad is dying of cancer.

It had taken a full month to build his ship.

Now he could never expore again.

Goodbye zoriad.

Novus Plebo

I’ve heard that I am to blame for the collapse of CODE.

However, James 315 knows the truth. I tried to save the alliance, but he wanted to die, so we could move on.

My critics hail from another alliance, from a backwards whiteknight dimension, where the CODE. logo is not orange… but blue. They praise their version of James, a boring gankbear named Hrothgar, who doesn’t even blog. Hrothgar left the New Order, but still craves the fame and the legacy. He uses the CODE. logo like a blue module, which he plagiarized to maximize his isk/hr.

Let me be clear. I left the CODE. alliance, because I saw no future in the alliance without James. In contrast, Hrothgar saw no future with James. His axis of autism is composed of salty former fans, who left CODE. before James quit blogging. They deleted their mining permits, and renounced James. Oh yes, they did.

I was recently checking for mining permits, when I stumbled across a counterfeit. Oh sure, it looks legitimate, but it doesn’t mention Aiko (or James). James loved me so much, that he wrote about my beauty and grace, but he forgot to mention either of us in this mining permit? Puh-leez. Here we witness a forgery.

Aiko Danuja > Why are you pretending to be CODE, with a blue James logo?
Darkside Tickler > you mention all these names…james…ets
Darkside Tickler > but i have no idea who that is
Aiko Danuja > Yeh, exactly…

So I killed the illegal miner.

Whadda was disgusted.

What kind of New Order agent would sell a permit for just 10 million isk, as if it’s some worthless piece of cheap trash?

Do you want proof that I’m the heiress to James 315?

Without a word from me, my alt’s alt can delete your fake permit, and sell the miner a permit that’s three times more valuable.

This is why James left me in charge, not you.

Cheers!

Luci Gotti Criesalot

Previously, we learned about Luci Gotti, and the ice assassins.

Here are some logs!

Luci Gotti > you use macros
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee
Luci Gotti > you use macros
Goose Lee > Gf
Luci Gotti > you hit f1 on 25 accounts within .05 seconds

Luci accused the geese of cheating.

Goose Lee > My hands are fast
Luci Gotti > no they arent
Luci Gotti > IP checked
Luci Gotti > all one IP
Cyras The Virus > I smell BS, how did you “IP Check” that many accounts that fast…

He did IP checks to prove it.

Goose Lee > Stay dead noob
Luci Gotti > server timer tick check
Luci Gotti > .05 seconds
Luci Gotti > within the same tick
Luci Gotti > of eve servers you hit f1 25 times
Luci Gotti > from the same IP address
Luci Gotti > you think im a noob LOL

Luci knows a macro hack when he sees it.

Luci Gotti > you cheated
Goose Lee > I cheated you from your loot
Luci Gotti > his 25 accounts are on one computer
Luci Gotti > one IP address
Luci Gotti > f1 25 times in .05 seconds
Luci Gotti > yeah, no one can hit that many f1’s
Goose Lee > My guns are actually on F2
Luci Gotti > marco users
Luci Gotti > macros
Luci Gotti > yeah all of them
Goose Lee > dead

Lee suggested that Luci submit a ticket.

Goose Lee > File a complaint to CCP
Luci Gotti > yeah, youre a dev huh
Luci Gotti > you are arent you
Luci Gotti > you work for CCP
Goose Lee > They will say, “Hello Luci Gotti, You’re a moron.Thanks”

However, Luci knows that Goose Lee is CCP Goose.

Goose Lee > I’m not a dev nor do I work for CCP.
Goose Lee > I’m just a player
Luci Gotti > you cheated
Luci Gotti > bro youre botted
Luci Gotti > you hit f1 25 times fater than a human can
Luci Gotti > hit f2 25 times in less than 0.1 seconds bro
Goose Lee > What can I say, my hands are just really fast
Luci Gotti > you are cheating bro
Luci Gotti > how can you lock and fire 25 accounts in under 2 seconds
Luci Gotti > with a 1.6 seconds lock tim LOLOL
Luci Gotti > try it
Luci Gotti > ITS NOT POSSIBLE
Goose Lee > What is my IP
Luci Gotti > stop trying to convince me when we all know you botting bro
Luci Gotti > you are using macros and repeaters and all sorts of crap
Goose Lee > So report us to CCP if we’re cheating
Luci Gotti > i dont care what you say bro, logic, and proof shows you are

With logic and proof, Luci made his case.

Luci Gotti > you are a dev, and your job is to cause spending which is illegal, or you are macro using HS ganker LOL
Luci Gotti > bro, you cheat, and bot, and use macros, on 25 accountsd to high sec gank LOLOL
Luci Gotti > i can explain it
Luci Gotti > bro hes macro botting
Cyras The Virus > no he is not…
Luci Gotti > and 50 acoutns
Luci Gotti > macro;’d botted
Luci Gotti > Goose Lee hey goosde i fucked you mom
Goose Lee > I fucked your freighter
Luci Gotti > Goosie, i fucked you sister too and your mom at the same time LOL
Luci Gotti > it was insestual
Luci Gotti > report me
Luci Gotti > for having insest weith your mom and sister LOL

Luci’s argument was most reasonable.

Goose Lee > I think you’re mad
Luci Gotti > come on man
Luci Gotti > am i harassing oyu?
Luci Gotti > am i harassing you bro?
Luci Gotti > i put your sister on top of your mom
Luci Gotti > then fucked them both
Luci Gotti > macro using chump
Luci Gotti > your cheating LOL
Luci Gotti > it wont matter, i’ll get all my stuff back from CCP, simply because you cheated
Luci Gotti > but hey, you are they type of person who cheats in a 18 year old video game in HIGH SEC
Luci Gotti > hey your mom sucks goast dick
Luci Gotti > LOL
Kapitane Bombardiero > well that is rude

This is who antigankers support.

Luci Gotti > you cheated LOL
Luci Gotti > you used a macro
Luci Gotti > you locked 25 ships within 1 second
Luci Gotti > not possible
Luci Gotti > then you fired on all 25 accounts within .05 seconds
Luci Gotti > again not possible
Luci Gotti > you are a cheater and you cheat, to fight non war ships in high sec
Luci Gotti > your that low LOL
Luci Gotti > and i fucked you mom and your sister on top of each other
Luci Gotti > cause you’re a cheter

That’s cool, I guess. You can do what you want in the sandbox.

Luci Gotti > i can agent locate you and follow you around
Luci Gotti > you fucking moron
Goose Lee > I live in Odin
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > sorry was that spamming
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > im spamming bro
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?

I’m glad to be on the winning team.

Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?
Taibhse Dom > If you guys manage to catch one of my freighters coming through please remind me not to bitch about being stupid likt that idiot
Luci Gotti > Goose Bee Goose Cee Goose Dee Goose Fee Goose Gee so goose when youre setting up that macro for those accounts are you using a bot repeater or a multi clicker?

Nobody likes a windowlicking more on whinebaby.

Ice Assassin

Luci Gotti lost a freighter.

So he sent an assassin to kill Sargon.

The assassin was a ganker, but not a very good one.

My elite antigankers always win, with 0 damage.

Afterward, there were some emails.

I guess the assassin is also an ice miner?

Remember, bulkheads go around your cargo hold, not inside it.

There’s really only one response.

It’s guaranteed to get a response.

Always!

The Rat Story

People just want the story to be told.

Who am I to deny the will of the shareholders?

Honestly, uh…

Believe it or not, gankers aren’t into animal cruelty.

Grey, the problem isn’t that you killed a rat, or even that you tortured it to death. We’ve all made mistakes, right? The problem is that you are openly sharing this information, oblivious to social norms, without any hint of social awareness. According to the FBI, this lack of self-evaluation is an indicator of “extreme risk”. We don’t brag about torturing animals to death, in fact, it’s illegal in some regions.

The good news, is that Grey is currently too busy to be a serial killer, and he will have to wait a few years before he finally finds the time. As it turns out, according to the FBI, it’s normal for serial killers to wait until they are in their thirties.

Grey, this is not the first time that people have shown concern over your comments. Have you considered the possibility that you are a serial killer?

Some people just think it’s a little off.

Ya know?

Like, hello?????

Put the knife down buddy.

Of course, the real test for serial killer tendencies is to investigate whether they have a Hannibal Lecter style fascination with cuisine.

Donatien Alphonse Francois > how do you like your steak cooked?
CorrinoGiovanni > Ratty
Grey Ignis > rare if it’s a restaurant I trust, if not, medium rare. When I cook it at home I cook it rare, with an aromatic butter sauce and a pan sear. I made a 26oz ribeye not too long ago that I was very proud of. Made some roasted potatoes as a side with a salad and had some port wine with ice cream for dessert
Grey Ignis > So actually the other day I made this salmon, and I decided to try my hand a a glaze idea that I had, I took maple syrup, a bit of port, accent, a dash of cayenne, lemon juice, rock salt, and rosemary, and then seared the fuck out of the salmon and then added the glaze so it could caramelize in the sugar, then I added some pepper after the fact. I had a kale salad on the side with roasted asparagus
darklegionca > and a side of rat?
zxcxzx > i hear dog is pretty good
Sargon Of Amerish > I diddily ding dong do wish we could chat longer, but i’m having an old friend for diddily ding dong dinneroo!
Grey Ignis > In tems of snacks, I’m not gonna lie, a good oatmeal is always a banger. I add anise, allspice, cloves, cinnamon, mace, and nutmeg to mine. Chopped pears or apples go great, and adding milk is always good. Mhmm, and it’s good for you, great way to get protein and filling carbs that aren’t cheap
Jinx Beirutbomb > It sounds like torture makes you hungry.

Like real talk, uh…

For Shame

Some miners are displeased.

I have gone and done it.

Nowadays, James is the patron saint of carebears.

It’s funny to me.

I think he would have laughed.

It’s too bad he died.

Believe it or not…

…I wrote the CODE. long before James.

The most important part is the conclusion.

All miners must be destroyed.

That’s what James wanted, when I wrote the Code.

If you are reading this, you are already in orbit.