Category: Always!

MARRY JUNETEENTH

Large Quafe Zero recently lost a Vedmak.

I’m a busy with real Juneteenth festivities, but I want to address his concerns. Look, if you fly a ship into lowsec, you should expect PvP. Furthermore, if you are streaming your location, you should definitely expect PvP! You may not like it, but nobody cares, so adapt or die. Your choice! Seriously, this is all we do, everyday. This is our lifestyle. If you feed us, we will feed off you. We do it like a record on repeat, and we are not going to stop. If you are the kind of person who plays Monopoly, and you just want to circle the board endlessly, then I’ve got some bad news for you. Rent is not optional!

Pro tip: Streaming is optional.

Victory in Tolle

Every day brings new victories.

When maximus died, I knew he was special.

He told his mining mates that everything was fine.

He thought he was winning.

maximus orelious > you lost more isk than me
maximus orelious > do the math
maximus orelious > you got schoooled
maximus orelious > yall lost more isk than me lmao
Jinx Beirutbomb > Miner, are you bad at math?
maximus orelious > i only lost 57 mil
maximus orelious > actually less cause my wreck stilll there
Aiko Danuja > How much salvage can you get from a retriever wreck?
Lufiaspawn > you’re all fools, he’ll make that isk back in 2 weeks of mining 10 hours a day!

Maximus didn’t believe a girl could kill an Orca.

If he read my blog, he’d know something.

Krig Povelli taught me a secret trick.

I can’t kill orcas, but my boyfriend can!

Maximus tried to bluff his way out.

Then he tried to scam me.

He even sent an unfit barge!

Meanwhile, the other Procurer tried ganking.

As always, I was victorious.

Nice!

LIVE UPDATE:

Dumb***

Dark Vemane is one dumb miner.

He still hasn’t graduated, despite playing longer than me.

While Dark was AFK, someone shot his empty MTU.

One ganker even died!

Dark laughed and laughed, at those DUMB*** gunkers!

Hahaha, lol, all they did was kill a free ____.

He was feeling pretty good about baiting me.

Oh…

Dark logged off quietly. 

Antiganking with Aiko

Even the best antigankers strive to perfect their craft.

Recently, I decided to level up.

I just won’t fight ships that can shoot back.

Tama is a safe space for my friends.

You are on Team Aiko, or you are trash.

Even big dog streamers are watching me.

There’s nothing else they can do.

Here’s a funny thought.

I literally have no balls, at all — in real life!

Erik Meets a Good Girl

Listening to: Chantilly Lace

Erik Draven was ganked by the Loot Fairy.

Poor Erik didn’t have a friend in the galaxy(((

Freedom left him empty inside.

Erik found himself watching a certain someone.

He began to feel something special.

This was his big chance, but did he really have to pay?!

Erik wanted to learn more about the High High Heroin.

As he studied her Holy Word, he was filled with FAITH.

Unlike Hrothgrrarianism, this is a CODE. which people want to be part of.

Doubting Erik experienced a miraculous conversion.

He wasn’t gonna wind up in an incel Lewakian monastery.

True happiness is Chantilly lace and a pretty face…

…and a pony tail ahangin down!

So spend all your money!