Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Listening to: Hazards
Fly Fearless alliance should be afraid.
They are not mission ready.
They are barely able to compose a coherent sentence.
However, miners are still men of a sort.
You know how men are…
I’m mission ready sexy.
The Devil only wants one thing.
This sexy talk concerned my IRL boyfriend.
So naturally Devilishh was sent to miner’s prison.
Meanwhile, Tweeps decided it was time to have the talk.
Uh oh.
It is what it is.
To be continued…
That’s right.
Previously, on Aikotopia.com…
Tee Ka became an antiganker.
Nothing could calm him down.
However, first he had to survive.
Unfortunately, this would require a lot of Highsec mining.
As an antiganker, he did his best to warn other miners.
However, he still has a soft spot for me.
In fact, Tee Ka has a lot of ganker friends.
He listed each of them.
It’s fair to say, Tee Ka likes me a lot.
However, he questions my good nature.
For some reason, he told me all about himself.
The antiganker decided to try his luck.
To be continued…
Previously, on AikoBompr…
Tee Ka declared himself a miner rebel.
The poor little guy had a rough time in Highsec.
Oof!
He vowed to become an antiganker.
Tee offered a lot of folksy wisdom.
As a member of my mining corp, he struggled to make miner friends.
The rebel leader had a curious history.
Like most Highsec miners, he was pathetic.
What would happen next?
To be continued…
Greetings!
My alliance has several accomplished Twitch streamers.
Recently, bushkitty was streaming EvE Online.
As always, antigankers began to cry.
Mary Viper couldn’t handle it.
Whine indeed.
What a silly miner.
Cheerzah!
A lot of One people felt I was hard on Andres.
Andres enjoys a relaxing mine.
That sounds like fun, right?
Why else would anyone mine?
Amazing content, in real-life and in EvE Online.
Andres, you have to choose, me or the ice.
It’s an addiction.
There’s only one solution.
Friends don’t let friends mine.
There’s much better content.
That’s why they call me Aiko.
It’s like a reverse Awox.
Yo, she cried less than Andres!
Internal Affairs Debrief – Bonus Extra Room 17T
I was cleared of all charges.
Listening to: Minimal Techno Classic 3
That’s a lie.
Andres M Afanador is a Highsec miner.
Like most miners, he just doesn’t get it.
Andres, we are not into mining.
Recently, Andres began mining for BLACKFLAG.
Apparently, they’ve fallen on hard times.
Andres, you need a mining permit!
So then the ganks began…
A gentle reminder to stop mining.
He actually thought BLACKFLAG would protect him?
Breaking News: Andres M Afanador caught mining in Highsec.
Our leadership has a consensus.
We all wanted a solution, including Tweeps (aka James 315).
Meanwhile, Andres was (not) salty.
Andres isn’t in my alliance, and he is mining. Is that loyalty?
Andres, I find your loyalty insufficient.
The diplomatic situation was deteriorating.
Fortunately, my friends are not stupid.
Andres the antiganker failed again.
Nobody likes an antiganker.
This is how things work in Highsec.
Stop mining.
Pay your taxes.
Obey the CODE. Safety agents.
Seek help.
Never go full miner.
Those minerals I mine are freeREEE!
Andres had a little too much ice.
I hope he calms down.
That might be difficult.
Bee well!
Listening to: Aftermath
Trigger Warning: EvE Online
Oh my, that one really crossed the line…
From time to time, we review CCP’s character name policy.
They take inappropriate names very seriously.
Let’s take a quick stroll through Search…
Everything looks fine here!
CCP has already addressed the most sensitive subjects.
EvE Online is a SAFE space.
No racism or inappropriate sexual content here!
Can you find the naughty word?
Hmph! Me neither…
Just harmless fun in EvE Online.
It’s impossible to get a naughty name past the GM team!
Anything catch your eye?
No worries here.
If nobody has killed themself in 7 years, it’s fine!
Just good clean fun for everyone.
As you can see, CCP is on top of it.
Nothing even remotely questionable here!
A decade is plenty of time to catch these bad boys!
This year, we award CCP a Gold Star.
Long gone are the days of blatantly offensive gamer names.
This is now a wholesome family game!
Every conceivable topic has been thoroughly addressed.
CCP is super woke.
Ok, see ya next year.
Have fun!
haha
=BEHIND THE SCENES=
Something went terribly wrong…
Another carebear fell from the sky.
That’s always amusing.
Nobody likes a miner.
Fortunately, some people are just out for ganking.
“Oh well, that’s EvE… that’s the game.”
Everybody knows the story.
Awox the awoxer, who awoxed his friends and family.
It sounds legit.
We’ve heard the story many times.
However, Awox always told a different tale…
He wasn’t an awoxer at all!
We brought him in for a quick interview.
This led to a surprising revelation.
I introduce to you, Awox the friendly carebear.
He couldn’t awox a fly.
He thinks awoxing is toxic.
The true story, according to Awox, is that the Mittani is a pedo.
Awox’s name is a tribute to his former employer’s beloved grandmother.
The goons invented griefplay to impugn her memory.
What a nice guy!
Awox prefers that people use my name, Aiko.
He’s also a fan!
…and now you know, the rest of the story.
=AFTERWORD=
The New Order helps a lot of miners.
SpaceX newbie mining corp CEO Elon is a typical pleb.
Even he knows how to butter my bread.
Meanwhile, in EvE Online…
…Elon’s fellow miners continue to cry.
It’s kinda funny.
That does look familiar…
Elon, we are here when you are ready.
No miner left behind!
SpaceX is the Absolute Order of our era.
What fun!
Meanwhile, in New York’s 1st Judicial District.
Thanks for the free PLEX Elon!
Maybe Elon just met his next ex-wife?
