Category: Victory

Yria is Syria, Part 1

Listening to: Every Rose Has Its Thorn

=WHY WE FIGHT=

Aiko watchers may remember the Audaerne Free Trade Zone, which evicted Silent Company and exiled them to Ronne.

Ikarus remembers…

All screenshots below from actual SICO interactions!

Silent Company is a pestilence upon Highsec, sucking new players into a mining trap. Newbros are soon bored to death with endless moon mining and scummy buybacks. Who will save them?

As a woman, in real-life and in EvE Online, I’m used to disgustingly inappropriate comments from incel miners. However, Silent Company has always struck me as particularly misogynistic.

Look, here’s the facts….

My boyfriend appreciates all the nice things I do for him, and when you try to shame me, he PLEXes all my accounts and his accounts and his friend’s accounts and even our mom’s accounts.

I’ve read what Silent Company has to say.

Their CEO, Ikarus Cesaille, claims “zero tolerance” for sexism, racism, and all those other isms. However, that’s just narcissistic whitewashing, as he attempts to weasel himself from the consequences of what his members have said and done.

Silent Company keeps it real classy, ya kno?

CCP knows I abide by the EULA.

I even got a GM commendation.

As a capsuleer in good standing, I am allowed to destroy you.

Excuse me, but my bra size is personal and private. I know my pictures are floating around, but you need to calm down.

Imagine, my surprise, when I realized this little group of toxic incels migrated from Ronne to Yria.

Apparently, Ikarus didn’t get the message.

Some things never change.

Oh, you do? You like that?

I think I’ll stick around.

Silent Company, I say to you…

I’ve heard you, I feel you, and I have decided upon a response.

To be continued…

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 47

Listening to: Tunnel Snakes Rule!

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 1

Mission Ready Mining (aka Fly Fearless) was not ready.

Years ago, Kalongned wrote a brief recap.

He wrote this back when I was busy euthanizing CODE.

After fleeing to Uemiseisen, the miners were still not ready.

Fortunately, an elite Assistance Group was deployed.

The AG team loves helping miners get ready!

In particular, they train miners to fight the Tunnel Snake Empire.

My alliance URL honors their experience, with a URL.

I also enjoy cybersex.

AG instructors would bump miners, during simulated Snake attacks.

Mission Ready Mining thus enjoyed a free Platinum training regimen.

This came with easy to understand audio instructions.

Miner bootcamp would continue indefinitely, and could only be terminated via payment of a modest cancellation fee.

Tunnel Snakes bump, gank, and wardec miners in Highsec. They tend to be rude to everyone, and spend much of their time cussing in local. Tunnel Snake sympathizers are also known to use vulgar language.

Meanwhile, local chat was continuously filled with fascinating factoids.

Founded in 2017, Assistance Group is a group of Trainers who are dedicated to defending Highsec. Assistance Group provides the expertise and support Highsec miners need to defend themselves against the Tunnel Snake menace.

The Tunnel Snakes have a number of corporations under their direct/indirect control. More specific intel on Tunnel Snakes and/or their affiliated organizations is only available to Class B or higher Trainers.

BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR: Individuals with the words ‘Tunnel Snake’ in player biographies, ship names, corporation names, etc. Class B and above Trainers can report Tunnel Snake activity in our invite-only intel channel.

Assistance Group’s hands on approach to training gives Highsec miners the edge they need to rid Highsec the Tunnel Snake menace. This means defeating not only the Tunnel Snakes, but their sympathizers and puppets as well.

Assistance Group Trainers provide our Highsec partners with a variety of exciting training opportunities, including: bumping, ganking, and more. This training prepares our partners for the tactics employed by our shared enemy.

Trainers work alone or in groups, Trainers can be found in icebelts and other areas designated as ‘training grids’, Not all training sessions are announced; many trainers consider any grid they occupy to be a training grid.

By November, the ‘Fly Fearless’ alliance was afraid.

In order to address this, live fire exercises began.

Many many miners were tested, and all were unready.

War was imminent!

As trainers, Kalorned and Tweeps listened to Fly Fearless comms.

This was most instructive.

To be continued…

Tee Ka Gets PkD (yet again), Part 5

Tee Ka Gets Pkd, Part 1

Previously, Tee Ka got Pkd, again and again…

His self-proclaimed antiganking career was not going well.

For some reason, he suddenly left my Highsec miner’s guild.

Then he doubled down on antiganking rhetoric.

He was downright hostile.

This went on for quite awhile.

He didn’t like the answer.

Once again, Tee Ka vowed to greet us on the gates.

He eventually found a soapbox in Kamio.

To be continued…

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 46

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 1

Previously, on some blog…

Kalorne and Tweeps defeated Mission Ready Mining.

Before Silent Company and Absolute Order, there was Fly Fearless.

Even today, the alliance boasts thousands of uninstalled new players.

In April 2017, they fled Gelhan, migrating to sunny Uemisaisen.

Mission ‘Ready’ miners were not happy to see Kalorndo.

Next door to Isanamo, Uemisaisen is a safe space for mining.

The miners were praying for CCP intervention.

Otherwise, a fleet of Machariels would permabump their miners.

To be continued…

End of an Era, Part 6

End of an Era, Part 1

Previously, on AikoBomp…

Our elite team engaged in competitive PvPvE.

We are hunting the momship.

The miners tried a last minute report defense.

That didn’t work.

Their tears were pitiful, yet plentiful.

The bears brainstormed a solution.

Then they began to give up.

As always, this was amusing.

To be continued…

Mission Ready Mining, Reloaded

Listening to: Hazards

Fly Fearless alliance should be afraid.

They are not mission ready.

They are barely able to compose a coherent sentence.

However, miners are still men of a sort.

You know how men are…

I’m mission ready sexy.

The Devil only wants one thing.

This sexy talk concerned my IRL boyfriend.

So naturally Devilishh was sent to miner’s prison.

Meanwhile, Tweeps decided it was time to have the talk.

Uh oh.

It is what it is.

To be continued…

That’s right.

Tee Ka Gets PkD, Part 4

Tee Ka Gets PkD, Part 1

Previously, on AikoBomp…

Tee Ka became an antiganker.

Then he invited me to mine with him?

However, I’m not a miner.

This would imperil our friendship.

Whoops!

The poor little guy got gunked on (yet again).

So Tee Ka cried at his best friend, Piper.

He urged her to betray Aiko!

To be continued…