Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Not all miners are entirely stupid.
They can figure it out.
Even the dumbest can figure it out.
I’m the best.
Unfortunately, miners are not.
There’s no hope for them.
They are AFK whinebabies.
It’s hard to take them seriously.
They ask too much.
Any other questions?
Your secret code is 613 multiplied by ???
Send your best guess, with 1 billion isk.
o7
Listening to: Mackinaw Gone
My name is Aiko Danuja.
I’m the greatest capsuleer in the history of EvE Online.
Everybody reads my blog.
Otherwise, they get punished.
Another miner saved…
Happy to help!
o7
Listening to: Get Wrecked
Listening to: Get Wrecked (Metal Remix)
I guess I like making music.
Here are some wrecks from Highsec.
Questionable mining themes are popular.
Some miners are more creative than others.
Others… less so.
Calm down, miners.
Listening to: Go Gank In High
Welcome back.
Miners are not calm.
They don’t like gankers.
They aren’t impressed.
They aren’t polite.
We are no better than Goons.
Here’s a great idea.
Bzzbzz.
o07!
Listening to: Dock Up Quick
Recently, Aveve Olerie found a botnest.
They are all dead now.
Meanwhile, SDENSK is still writing essays.
The miners have given me a new name.
Hail High Princess Aiko, the Jackal Queen!
That’s right.
Players are massively hearing about me.
I’m a real saddie.
This is what it’s like to be a space celebrity.
Now I’m crying frfr.
They are gonna bully train on me.
There’s a reason I’m so space famous…
Suddenly, my plan went awry!
Wtf?
I overplayed my hand, and SDENSK felt guilty.
Can you guess what happened next?
I overplayed my hand again.
Some people like my attitude.
Others… not so much.
I know how to get what I want.
o7 bro!
Listening to: Villains in the Air
Watch out…
EvE Online has a lot of evildoers.
Fortunately, Trey Bakker filed a police report.
So Tip engaged the target.
This was a Golem class maraudership!
Wait a minute…
Is Trey Bakker the bad guy?
He was trying to bribe an agent.
Meanwhile, a clock was ticking.
Suddenly, Krig did a magic trick.
I guess Trey ran out of time!
It was an expensive lesson.
F.L.Y.S.A.F.E.
Listening to: UNDOCK and GET DROPPED
Neffi Cake might be allegedly permabanned, but that hasn’t stopped him from reading my blog. Neffi called co-conspirator Srajin, who brought a few shorties, and they let the lyrics flow.
Meanwhile, I’m still hearing from SDENSK.
He knows what to call me.
That’s right.
I tried to tell him.
What an idiot.
I HATE my new nickname.
What out for Aiko and the Poodle Squad.
Nobody wants to be a flying poodle.
Gankers hate that.
I sure hope he gets paid.
Is he asking me out?
Bro…
Grrrr jackalhathathathta
What a sad story.
What?
I guess I’m a typical predator.
At least I’m good at something.
o7
Watching: The Day of the Jackal
SDENSK continues to celebrate the Jackal of Highsec.
Whatever will I do?
The snowball is turning.
We are both having fun!
Meanwhile, I’ve found another miner.
He isn’t doing much.
Poor fellow.
Who is doing this?
I bet it’s that showel hating jackal.
There’s only one rule in Haysek.
I make the rules!
Cheerzah brav.
Listening to: Day of the Jackal
Welcome back.
Yesterday, Aiko and her blue poodle made a mess.
It was the DAY OF THE JACKAL.
BOOM! Headshot.
It was a long day.
I like to stay in touch.
SDENSK knows the JACKAL OF HIGHSEC.
“This message in the local chat is seen by every player of the safe solar system I fly into. Following this message, he sees this: Victory: SDENSK (Praxis*) to back up my words. The players thank me. Amarr, Zhita are no exception. Everywhere I fly, in every solar system where there are players, this message pops up. This will continue daily until you reimburse me for my tractors and my Praxis, which were destroyed by you. Something tells me that in a couple of months, all players who play in safe solar systems will have your gang marked with a red flag. Each of you. When you appear in the locale, everyone will know that freaks have flown into the solar system. I have been doing this for the third day. The more you delay with payment, the more people will put jackals like you on their blacklists. You pay 500,000,000 (five hundred million isk).”
I tried to negotiate.
However, he wants to punish me.
That’s the last thing I want!
This is blackmail and extortion…
I just want an apology.
No deal!
Everybody must know about the jackal.
He plans to tell everyone about my targeted assassinations.
Please don’t throw me in that briar patch!
He’s a professional antiadvertiser…
Now I’m starting to cry.
In EvE Online, reputation is everything.
Weak minds are susceptible to reverse psychology witchcraft.
He has the upper hand.
The entire playerbase will hear of me.
Then he found the other Aikos.
This is just sadistic!
What a game.
He soon found support in Zhita local.
I create fun content for Highsec miners.
I am Princess Tabaqui, the High Witch of Agil.
Everybody loves me.
Meanwhile, in Zhita local.
> WATCH OUT FOR MARY GUNKINS
Everybody is talking about the jackal.
SDENSK is making big isk!
He’s winning bigly.
That’s right.
Suddenly friends.
o7 bro
Listening to: Gangsta Aiko
I’m now doing requests.
This blog is getting better all the time!
Indeed.
Recently, SDENSK had a bad day.
Wtf?
Bro…
Space littering is a capital felony.
Miners love good girls.
I know what they want.
What’s a shmara?
Guilty as charged!
The hypocrisy is endless.
Are all men the same???
What a charmer.
He wants it bad!
Miners need to keep it in their pants.
Oh, he’s not done?
I sent him a link to my pinterest.
He liked that.
I’m glad I killed him.
Get eaten…
Sounds like a plan!
o7
Rollin’ through the belts, cruisin’ on autopilot,
Highsec grindin’, where the ore be silent.
Got the lasers hummin’, beams so golden,
Stackin’ Veldspar, wallet lookin’ swollen.
Asteroids twinkle, they callin’ my name,
That dank space dust, yeah, fuelin’ the game.
Cargo hold fat, holdin’ all that glow,
But Princess Aiko lurkin’, yo, keep it on the low.
Get that good good ore, stack it to the ceiling,
Space dust in my lungs, yeah, you know the feelin’.
Mining in the zone, gotta watch for the snare,
Princess Aiko a gangsta, she don’t fight fair.
Warp core steady, but my mind stay hazy,
Clouds of that green, keep my moves all lazy.
Rock after rock, yeah, I’m claimin’ my stake,
But them gankers out here, man, they plot and they take.
Comets rain riches, but it ain’t all sweet,
Galaxy’s a jungle, gotta watch your fleet.
Princess Aiko , she a queenpin in the void,
Pop your pod quick, leave your ship destroyed.
Get that good good ore, stack it to the ceiling,
Space dust in my lungs, yeah, you know the feelin’.
Mining in the zone, gotta watch for the snare,
Princess Aiko a gangsta, she don’t fight fair.