Category: antigankers

Glenduil the Slow

Glenduil is a SAFE miner.

CCP gave him a carebear buff, and he feels like a boss.

He put on max shields, and removed the mining gear.

Cool fit bro.

In EvE Online, mining barges have more hitpoints than warships.

Glenduil was excited to earn 1-2 cents an hour.

One day, he met some friendly gankers!

They declined to gank his max tank bait.

Gelnduil is nearly invincible in his Highsec poverty fit.

Let’s tune in to local chat.

Ganker spy Learza congratulated Glenduil on his minimal yield.

Nah, it’s fine bro, just mine like that.

Glenduil was flummoxed.

His minimum yield zero product fit is encouraged.

Glenduil won a few pennies for his time and effort.

Carebears can survive indefinitely in an 0.8.

I hope Glenduil has fun!

He sure isn’t getting rich.

=BREAKING NEWS=

Christmas Deathwish

Listening to: Precious

EvE Online has some interesting characters.

Sometimes they go too far.

This is the story of Longtooth the Miner.

Hey there.

Normally, carebears use a Vexor.

He found me attractive.

Never trust a man who mines in Highsec.

He actually was a new player.

Barely eighteen years old…

Just another antisocial sociopathic CEO in EvE Online.

We soon learned a shocking truth…

This guy is a total pleb.

Just then, Good Girl Kara tried to stick up for me.

Oof!

Just a typical Highsec miner.

At least he’s not mad.

He’s just… not well in the head.

What a guy.

Cheerzah!

Novus Plebbo

Listening to: CASTOLE RADIO

It’s no secret.

We were in CODE, and they weren’t.

They were are mad at James 315.

I call them gankbears.

After James died, it was time to take out the trash.

So we got rid of Hrothgar Nilsson.

However, he made his own alliance, pretending to be us.

Like, for real bro.

James called them ‘former fans’.

[ 2017.03.24 22:58:46 ]
Hrothgar Nilsson > i’m about to go mining.
Hrothgar Nilsson > undocking in my mining ship. gank away.
Hrothgar Nilsson > these are not competing professions
Hrothgar Nilsson > the whole is greater than the sum of its part. Null-sec F1 monkey + agent, or miner + agent, or station trader + agent….. you get better at both by being both
Hrothgar Nilsson > i have successfully baited half a dozen concordokkens

Hrothgar runs a mining alliance.

Sad, but true.

Weird, but true.

So I accepted his challenge.

Doctor Zarkov > i made billions that is just a minoe drawback

AFK carebears aren’t real gankers.

They use their character bio as a blog?

xD

Gankbears just grind for isk.

I PvP for fun.

He didn’t want that pod anyways!

Here’s another Plebbo scout.

GF!

That’s right.

That’s right!

FRUSTRATION

Oh boy…

Let’s check it out!

Nullsec is the home of fair honorable PvP?

That’s right.

TLDR: Crybaby wants to roleplay, but is a bad.

Boohoohoo.

This pirate game has too many pirates!

Grrrhathathat.

This guy just needs a permit.

Mining permits are more popular than ever!

<=COMMUNITY RESPONSE=>

That’s right.

That’s right!

Everybody knows PvP is for antisocial psychopathics.

Nobody likes a time bandit!

Woah, this is no joke…

I’m an IRL cyberterrorist.

<=CAREBEAR ZONE=>

<=FINAL ANALYSIS=>