Feliz Navidad!

I guess it’s that time of year.

That’s right.

That’s also right.

Of course, some people lack holiday spirit.

What are your New Year’s resolutions?

I’m probably gonna have fun.

I even learned a cute new spell.

Cheerzahcadabbra!

Another happy miner.

I love to help.

xD

Where will he go next?

Glenduil the Slow

Glenduil is a SAFE miner.

CCP gave him a carebear buff, and he feels like a boss.

He put on max shields, and removed the mining gear.

Cool fit bro.

In EvE Online, mining barges have more hitpoints than warships.

Glenduil was excited to earn 1-2 cents an hour.

One day, he met some friendly gankers!

They declined to gank his max tank bait.

Gelnduil is nearly invincible in his Highsec poverty fit.

Let’s tune in to local chat.

Ganker spy Learza congratulated Glenduil on his minimal yield.

Nah, it’s fine bro, just mine like that.

Glenduil was flummoxed.

His minimum yield zero product fit is encouraged.

Glenduil won a few pennies for his time and effort.

Carebears can survive indefinitely in an 0.8.

I hope Glenduil has fun!

He sure isn’t getting rich.

=BREAKING NEWS=

FRUSTRATION

Oh boy…

Let’s check it out!

Nullsec is the home of fair honorable PvP?

That’s right.

TLDR: Crybaby wants to roleplay, but is a bad.

Boohoohoo.

This pirate game has too many pirates!

Grrrhathathat.

This guy just needs a permit.

Mining permits are more popular than ever!

<=COMMUNITY RESPONSE=>

That’s right.

That’s right!

Everybody knows PvP is for antisocial psychopathics.

Nobody likes a time bandit!

Woah, this is no joke…

I’m an IRL cyberterrorist.

<=CAREBEAR ZONE=>

<=FINAL ANALYSIS=>

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #248

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #247

Nobody can read it all.

An ocean of salt, decades deep.

In EvE Online, you can be anything you want.

Some people are crybabies.

I’m just a tabloid journalist, in outer space.

I’m also a social worker, and your new high princess (hi there).

By many accounts, I’m the best.

I run a real bad corp.

It’s an intergalactic cartel.

My friends are happy to help.

We go way back.

I’ll see you on the gates.

Cheerzah brav.

Mad Cuz A Gank

Torvald Uruz quit, but then came back.

The instanced abyssalbear got ganked.

Next, he temper tantrum ragequit.

I investigated the mood in his channel.

The community is disappointed with Torvald.

Nobody likes a crybaby quitbear.

Torvald didn’t leave anything for friends.

Maybe he never had any.

He’s just big mad.

Cool story bro.

I guess he’s salty at CCP.

Oh well.

Farewell lonely spaceman.

Nobody is impressed.

What a waste.

Not a good way to go.

Yikes.

Sad.

Anyways.

=BONUS QUITTERS=

So many tragic stories…

Cheerzah!


Thirteen Years of Failure

Let’s check out the old forums.

Chribba is bad at EvE, and worse at website design.

“Did it begin with killing mining bots…”

Let’s take a walk in history…

Some things never change.

Miners always whine and salt.

It never stops.

“What happens to us new players?”

Here’s more…

They have not evolved in over a decade.

That’s right.

“Today, a bunch of gankers descended upon the belt our corp is in and blew up a couple of ships with that suicide catalyst fit they all have (because, apparently, no one can custom fit anything anymore). This is the same group of guys that started harassing us in belts a few days ago…”

Those goshdarn gankers!

GarrRR.

“Basically they are players who want to be PVPers but every time they go looking for PVP they get their butts kicked. So rather than putting the effort into learning to be competitive they go kill players they know they can not loose against, namely miners and haulers. then to make them selves feel better about totally failing at PVP they act all macho and say they do it for the tiers.”

“Really there is no point to it. It takes no skill, you can not learn to PVP by killing players who can not shoot back, and there is rarely any reward in it. But some asshats just don’t get it. For some reason it makes them feel l33t when they kill carebears. How is killing a defenseless carebear something to be proud of? It is like the difference between shooting an animal in a cage or actually going out and hunting where the animal actually has a chance at survival. The ganker would have you believe that shooting the animal in the cage is the same as shooting an animal in the wild, after all they are still shooting the same animal. They seem to miss the fact that the point of hunting that makes it fun is the challenge of the hunt not just the act of pulling the trigger.”

 “My beef is with the gankers who have no PVP skills and the only way they get kills is by ganking. Ganking does not make you a PVPer… also blobbing is not a form of grieving while ganking although not always grieving, can be, and often is, used for grieving.”

Hathathat.

“CCP has already taken steps to tone down the level of ganking. The problem is that the ganking community revolts and rages against this and only goes out and ganks more. If we continue to escalate the level of ganking CCP will be FORCED to drop the hammer. THIS CANNOT BE ALLOWED TO HAPPEN!! The ganking community will have no one to blame but themselves. Law enforcement must step up…”

Where did all these gankers come from?

“…and formed their own alliance of greatly overrated, obnoxious, narcissistic, stupid, worthless, arrogant, rotund malcontents.”

“…the demographic of pew-pew basement dwellers who got picked on in high school for being too fat/acne ridden/smelly/short/whatever who now find their only two pleasures in life comes from 1) Feeling like Real Big Men from ganking people who can’t even shoot back and 2) Furry “erotic art.” They don’t care about the economy, they don’t care about supply and demand, nor do they care about anything except finally having found an alternate reality where they get to be the schoolyard bully…”

” You can’t hack in the real PvP world so you want to head over into hi-sec and thump on some newbies and unarmed mining ships to help your flaccid e-peen to feel big again. And when we tell you to get lost you cry Carebare.” 

What of the original question?

“It started as soon as the game launched, myself and a group of friends from beta all made alts and would fit tech 1 neutrons to velators with antimatter and use about 4 or 5 to gank the extremely common at the time bestower with a single mining laser left afk to mine in the days and weeks after launch.”

=FINAL WORDS=

Cyberbullying is the use of the Internet and related technologies to harm other people, in a deliberate, repeated, and hostile manner. It involves the use of information and communication technologies to support deliberate, repeated, and hostile behavior. So people who “shitpoast”, repeatedly gank miners, use locator agents, “make it personal”, convo, post said convo’s on forums, etc… are cyberbullying. Period.”

==GANKER REBUTTAL==

Indeed.