Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Previously, we met Barnso.
Unfortunately, Barnso did not fly safe.
What happened?
At least he likes me.
Barnso applied for SRP.
Barnso was excited to win 6.21 billion isk.
So he sent me a portion of his prize money.
He also tipped Sargon.
What a nice guy!
Cheers!
=BONUS ROUND=
Molly continues to bump the Miner Hunting Service.
I love my space job!
Previously, we met lorrenzo nub.
lorrenzo doesn’t like us.
So he began building a space army.
However, first he went mining.
Ahbazon is a SAFE space.
As a findom, I expect tribute.
Of course, he also needed a mining permit.
Lorrenzo was happy, because mining permits are real.
Oh no!
Drone Task Force was on the case…
To be continued…
I went a’whoring in nullsec.
I have more isk destroyed than entire alliances.
I do elite nullsec PvP.
Everybody was happy to see me.
I even offered bonus rounds.
Good times in EvE Online.
Killi got griefed in Highsec.
The celebrity had an important announcement.
However, he erased it.
Instead, he had a personal message for me.
“Bitch is gonna fuckin die” (direct quote).
Well, I got a message for you, Killiwutsurname.
You already done died, buttercup.
Haha, what a goofbear.
TRIGGER WARNING: MEAN WORDS
I always think, ya know, I got other things I’d rather do than play EvE Online, or write about it… but then I log in, and encounter the incredible stupidity of Idiocracy Online.
Previously, I discussed how incompetent antigankers continually fail, whilst roleplaying success. It’s never clear what they accomplished, but they sure as hell didn’t stop any gankers.
Recently, we spotted Highsec Plebtards camping Juunigashi with Stormbringers, desperately hoping to sperg lightning bolts in a windowlicking attempt to save a freighter.
The obvious solution was to warp into Uedama (with the dummydumdums following like Keystone Cops), as we then warped into Ikao, and back into Juunigashi to kill the target.
I could not conceal my contempt.
I honestly question the time I’ve invested in EvE, but at least I’m going down in history as the all time greatest. However, how does one justify investing even more time (years more than me), and yet failing to come close? It’s like, when you are slamming homeruns out of the stadium, how can you possibly have respect for a permapleb who is drunk on antifreeze and all-you-can-eat chilidogs?
Running a bunch of alts is bad enough, but imagine running a bunch of alts and failing to accomplish anything!
Apparently, some people refer to their alts as “we”.
The antiganker posed an interesting question…
I once heard of a turboautist, who wasted years following Jason, Joe/Bob, Aussie, brainlet, Benji, loyal/Trump, etc.
This goblok would always believe he saved a freighter, proudly proclaiming, “Freighter saaaaaaaaved.”
I simply cannot stand a stupid man.
However, did “we” save the freighter?
Apparently not!
Suddenly, the loser didn’t want to gloat.
Eventually, he showed the true nature of the whiteknight.
I believe him.
I’m cute!
Miners ask silly questions.
What do you think?
V3rbal also wanted his ship back.
He’s just a 2009 newbro.
With years of experience, he tried a little trick.
It’s the ol “gimme my ship back” scam.
We did our best to help him out.
It’s always a pleasure to help newbros.
Another happy customer.
I hope he enjoyed his space adventure.
Game Over.
The once mighty CODE. alliance had terminal autism.
Literally, autism.
NOL Director Super Perforator was unwell.
Super declared war on Aiko!
He roleplayed “victory”.
Victorious gankers should stop ganking. Right?
Super Perfie had no time for gankers.
Perfie preferred antigankers.
However, a princess cannot abide antigankers…
So Super Perforator ban/muted all the gankers.
Perfie was seduced by antiganker “agent” Knowledgeminer
Fortunately, Aiko has powerful friends in Highsec.
Knowledgeminer was arrested!
However, Super Perforator continued to harbor antigankers.
Meanwhile, Perfie autistically denied the death of James 315.
Inevitably, The Conference Elite denounced New Order Logistics.
Everyone said NOL is trash.
So TCE decided to form a new alliance, without NOL.
Stay tuned for a brief history of the CODE. alliance.
To be continued…
Bee well.
I love helping Highsec miners.
I also help lowsec bears.
Kuben craved attention.
However, he had no time for poors.
Kuben wanted the boss b.
So he went to the source.
We were amazed.
Kuben is a real money man.
PLOT TWIST: Kuben is also a secret agent!
He’s watching me!
Kuben infiltrated deep inside.
I’m surrounded by traitors!
Kuben knows what I did.
The truth is out.
DOPPLE TWIST: I actually am a secret agent.
I will cut a b.
I done did it.
I have so many names.
You can’t stop any of me.
We are already closer than you realize.
It’s way too late.
In EvE Online, only one name matters.
That’s right!
Everybody knows it.
You love it.
Cheers!
I’ve lived through a lot of EvE history. The IRL death of James 315, the extinction of TEST, the purging of Mittens (also IRL), the dissolution of the Imperium, and now we observe the end of TDF.
Like most newbro friendly pedo guilds, TDF was dedicated to maximizing their isk/hr, via Highsec incursions.
These losers thought they were cool, but…
All autism must end.
The war was over before it began.
Wow, that was actually really easy.
Profitable too.
I hope TDF had as much fun as we did…
Cheerios!
Another dead miner, and another great video.
GalactusGalactuss also released a music video.
Unfortunately, Galactus is being salty again.
He left my Discord in a huff.
Why do some people have to be cringy, always?
Meanwhile, gankbear MacGybo also made a video.
The video is incredibly boring.
Ganking for isk/hr is newbro friendly.
MacGybo prides himself on “profit” – legitimate gameplay.
However, miner permit roleplay is TOXIC.
Ethical gankers only kill newbros who lag out in Jita.
Hold on. I gotta say, like, wow. Before I ever even heard of EvE Online, before I ever started playing the game, this guy was camping the Jita undock and taking advantage of new players.
I never took 29 billion isk from a one day old character. However, MacGybo has the hypocritical audacity to claim that I am the griefer. You can debate whether I’ve driven a new player to quit, but you can be absolutely certain MacGybo has. That’s a fact.
We now return to ongoing Hateless drama.
In his own discord, Hateless is on the defensive.
Hateless has been struggling to gain sympathy.
Adrian Vexier made a compelling defense.
What will happen next?
Will Hateless get revenge on the space bully griefer guild?
