‎James 315 Space – Page 108 – Official Home of the New Order of Highsec

I like your Bratwurst

I’m every miner’s fantasy.

They just love me.

Sometimes, their brain melts.

Germans appear particularly susceptible to my charms.

I’m not sure what is wrong with that race.

I suppose their best DNA was lost an der Ostfront.

What?

That’s right. Germans never know when to give up.

Are Bavarians even actually people?

Oh well, at least it recognizes a lawful Prinzessin.

A business model, written in blood! Aiko shoots miners who don’t want anything other than to enjoy peace and quiet. She is so mean and vile, that one is sometimes left breathless. At long last, does she even know shame? I love mining, because it gives me a feeling of calm. However, she comes along and ruins everything!

What a funny little sauerkraut.

Welcome Back

Welcome back, Ralliana.

As you can see, I moved the community to Safety.

Frankly, I had a lot of help from Lewak.

James. Friend. You can’t go AFK, and let a bottle of booze run your alliance.

So don’t blame shift at me. I didn’t want this. I loved CODE.

Super cringe.

Be careful!

He’s literally an idiot, irl, fyi.

However, even Super can see the problem with James.

An AFK saviour is no saviour at all.

He ignored Globby.

He even ignored the #1 PvP champion of all time.

Loyal wasn’t bluffing.

James forced a fateful decision.

Sometimes, we need new leadership.

That’s right.

Many people say that I am sensational.

Others think I’m just a nice lady.

One thing is crystal clear.

The law is immutable.

Your consent is not required.

Thanks for understanding.

Be well. o7

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #224

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #223

Highsec miners are just innocent noobs, right?

I don’t think so…

Nope!

James used to do kills of the week, as part of his daily grind, but whatevs. As you can see, my sexy alliance is one of the most powerful forces in the galaxy, whereas the once mighty CODE. alliance has withered like a neglected fern. Even Elise Randolph, the Pandemic Whore, acknowledges my divine glory.

It sucks to think about CODE, but don’t blame me. I’m not the one who refused to tend the garden. Hey, if your stagnant aquarium is covered in mildew and slime, with black mold everywhere, then it’s time to drain the swamp. Sad!

Now that we have put the old gods out to pasture, we are free to innovate and try things which were once sacrilegious, resulting in a permanent ban from the minerbumping channel. For example, Sargon invented Miner Bingo: Yahtzee Arena. If you can get seven (7) bingos in a row, you can take me on a date. Wink! Super gankbears might scowl and grumble, but they can’t stop us from having fun!

I did it! James went AFK, and I enforced the law, as he would have wanted.

Good for me. I’m having a blast.

Like, hello?

What did he expect us to do?

Everybody just wants to have a good time.

I am here to help.

BONUS VIDEO

3footninja65 A is a notorious botbear, with way too many mining ships. When I won the Third Great CODE. Civil War, he tagged along. Why does he mine so much? Mr Cheng’s video is way too long, but the first five minutes are great. At least wait for Mr. A to start rapping. Haha. Bro.

Talk to your therapist

Silly miners.

Wake up!

Ledrian recently returned to EVE. Yes, that Ledrian.

Meanwhile, I’m such a bad girl.

Oof. Getting all kinds of distorted attention.

Carebears think my channel should serve as a suicide hotline.

If I don’t want to help miners, then I am supposed to ignore them.

Furthermore, I’m not qualified for bonus giveaways.

I’m sorry about your mental issues, but that’s not my problem. As if. At the video arcade, you aren’t going to get free gameplay tokens because you claim to be suicidal. Furthermore, the clerk behind the popcorn stand doesn’t care. Sorry!

I’m a really nice lady, but I’m not going to let you win.

You should, like, talk to your therapist about me.

OMG.

Miners are soo mental.

Gross!

Safety. Announcement

From time to time, as Chief Safety Officer, it is my duty to make a Safety. announcement to ensure safe mining for all miners. That’s fair, right? Miners always beg for a warning, and this is the warning. You’ve been warned.

WARNING

Today’s Safety. announcement is brought to you by Zopiclone.

Thank you Zopi.

When you purchase unsafe items, we know.

Don’t you want to live, and see your grandchildren?

Safety violations are serious offenses.

Just think of us, as a less friendly version of the CODE.

Hell hath no fury like a female ganker.

We are like Germans, but sexy and competent.

This is not a negotiation.

Safety isn’t free.

Safety isn’t cheap.

Don’t be stiped.

Sigh…

Some people are winners, some people are losers.

I honestly have no idea.

Thanks miner!

Be well.

I’m drunk (again)

Hey, everybody, it’s me – AikO! Hiya.

It’s hard to blog, and drink at the same time.

That’s right.

I’m just a silly girl, not a real man like James 315.

Here’s a funny thought.

The New Order belongs to me…

…and I know exactly how to proceed.

I’ll see you in Hek!

Just admit it, you love me.

You know what I want.

Proof of Concept, Part 3

Previously, in James 315 space… The mighty CODE. alliance imploded overnight, catching antigankers, carebears, James 315, and Matterall completely off guard.

Subsequently, Princess Aiko declared victory. Highsec is now a safe space.

However, Aiti Jen Ichinumi had doubts.

When Aiko offered to sell Aiti a ‘safety pass’ for the low price of just 10 100 million isk, Aiti launched into a familiar diatribe against James. Who is that?

Aiti likes nice gankers, not mean space bully griefers.

He was delighted to learn of Aiko’s glorious victory over the CODE.

Like it or not, Aiko seems to be a natural communicator.

She sure knows how to make a man feel safe.

Safe for everyone, including Aiko’s antiganking friends.

It sure is nice to be friends with Aiko.

What a special little lady.

She’s the best.

Hail Aiko!

Proof of Concept, Part 2

Previously, in James 315 space… Princess Aiko seduced the New Order and led everyone into a totally new alliance, called Safety.

Why did she do this? What happened?

Miners don’t like the new alliance.

There’s even a theory that Safety. might have a griefer space bully agenda.

What do you think?

Does Aiko intend to moderate and restrain the New Order?

Aiti Jen Ichinumi recently found himself on a collision course with fate.

Aiti was fed up with mean bully gankers, and just wanted safety.

Be careful what you wish for!

To be continued…

Big Deal

I’m defo a big deal.

You aren’t truly space famous, until people you don’t even know are making EVE videos starring your beautiful face. Apparently, someone noticed that Highsec has a new queen. That’s right.