Globby Got Dunked

Listening to: Princess We Obey

I’ve been busy.

Previously, antiganker Valryon defected.

Antiganking the gankbears has never been so lucrative!

Globby just inspired me.

That’s right.

Cry harder, bitch.

Can’t think of a more deserving person.

Famous last words…

Nazi around and find out.

#MENTAL

Globby was getting S.A.L.T.Y.

I love it!

I do, for real.

I literally wrote a book on Sun Tzu.

Come and take it, bro.

They had a bad plan, as we anticipated.

Sun Tzu called this, “Tempting the Bull”.

#BAITEDONAFREE

Globby only thought about isk.

We thought about moon cycles.

We gladly gave them enough to hang themselves.

Our plan worked, as always.

We gave them a second third fourth fifth? chance.

We do eventually respond to aggression.

Then they fucked up (again).

So they were punished.

We fucked them up.

Thanks for the year of drama, bro.

I started with dogfucker Don, and then I moved on to the anti-Semite, and finally I came for the n-word users and that CODE. neo-Nazi who keeps humming Das Horst-Wessel-Lied in Teamspeak… Did you know that song is illegal?

In EvE Online, politics are wars by other means.

The freighter gankers are were L.O.S.E.R.S.

Like, for real.

This is funny.

Ho ho ho.

I don’t need those people in my alliance.

I gave Globby one final chance.

Consider yourself warned, bro.

Bro, I will fuck you up.

What a bitch.

Mistakes were made (again and again).

It was a bad strategy.

I’ve got new friends now.

Globby actually gave me the idea.

The antigankers love this idea.

Now that’s high praise indeed.

Do I need racists, anti-Semites, and neo-Nazis in my alliance?

Some people just don’t have the right character.

You’ve gotta be cool.

Miners can’t stay calm.

Bro, try breathing exercises.

Meanwhile, Valryon has completed his homage to me.

Your enemies are now my friends.

We did it!

Let’s hear what antigankers say about me.

Even my sworn enemies, acknowledge I’m the best.

My powers are incredible.

There’s no shame in accepting the Mule of Highsec.

Let’s recap.

I guess things are going well (for me).

How are things going for you?

o7

To be continued…

THE GANKBEARS, aggrieved at having no established Executor, sent ambassadors to James 315 entreating for a King. Perceiving their aspirations, he cast down the CODE. The bears were terrified at the splash occasioned by its fall and hid themselves in the depths of Uedama. But as soon as they realized that the huge treatise was motionless, they swam again to the top of the water, dismissed their fears, climbed up, and began squatting on it in contempt. After some time they began to think themselves ill-treated in the appointment of so inert a Ruler, and sent a second deputation to James praying that he would set over them another sovereign. He then gave them Super Perforator. When the bears discovered his simple nature, they sent yet a third time, begging James to choose another. James, most displeased with all of them, unleashed a Princess who preyed upon the bears till there were none left.

Get Wrecked

Listening to: Get Wrecked
Listening to: Get Wrecked (Metal Remix)

I guess I like making music.

Here are some wrecks from Highsec.

Questionable mining themes are popular.

Some miners are more creative than others.

Others… less so.

Calm down, miners.

Jackal in the Henhouse

Listening to: Gangsta Aiko

I’m now doing requests.

This blog is getting better all the time!

Indeed.

Recently, SDENSK had a bad day.

Wtf?

Bro…

Space littering is a capital felony.

Miners love good girls.

I know what they want.

What’s a shmara?

Guilty as charged!

The hypocrisy is endless.

Are all men the same???

What a charmer.

He wants it bad!

Miners need to keep it in their pants.

Oh, he’s not done?

I sent him a link to my pinterest.

He liked that.

I’m glad I killed him.

Get eaten…

Sounds like a plan!

o7

Rollin’ through the belts, cruisin’ on autopilot,
Highsec grindin’, where the ore be silent.
Got the lasers hummin’, beams so golden,
Stackin’ Veldspar, wallet lookin’ swollen.
Asteroids twinkle, they callin’ my name,
That dank space dust, yeah, fuelin’ the game.
Cargo hold fat, holdin’ all that glow,
But Princess Aiko lurkin’, yo, keep it on the low.
Get that good good ore, stack it to the ceiling,
Space dust in my lungs, yeah, you know the feelin’.
Mining in the zone, gotta watch for the snare,
Princess Aiko a gangsta, she don’t fight fair.
Warp core steady, but my mind stay hazy,
Clouds of that green, keep my moves all lazy.
Rock after rock, yeah, I’m claimin’ my stake,
But them gankers out here, man, they plot and they take.
Comets rain riches, but it ain’t all sweet,
Galaxy’s a jungle, gotta watch your fleet.
Princess Aiko , she a queenpin in the void,
Pop your pod quick, leave your ship destroyed.
Get that good good ore, stack it to the ceiling,
Space dust in my lungs, yeah, you know the feelin’.
Mining in the zone, gotta watch for the snare,
Princess Aiko a gangsta, she don’t fight fair.

Double Isk

Listening to: Aiko Danuja, The Musical

The clue crew knows my score.

Check it out.

That’s right.

I’m not hard to understand.

This train is just getting started.

Are you ready to ride?

My people are the best.

I’ve got some interesting new ideas.

Thank you friends!

Chuggachuggachoochoo!

=COMING SOON TO A TWITCH NEAR YOU=

=PAID ADVERTISEMENT=

=YOUR ADVERTISEMENT HERE FOR 1 BILLION ISK=

o7 James!

That’s right.

I forgive you.

Get Therapy

Listening to: Princess Aiko’s Coming

The Wormhole Police Department is too kind.

Some people accept me, do you?

That’s beautiful.

I’m beautiful!

Let’s check out our Fate and Destiny.

Doing well, as always.

The Dodixie trade hub is under siege!

Miners are easily agitated.

They can mine with Safety…

Now that’s just crazy talk!

I know the cure.

Just kill them.

GFY

My ice agents enforce the law.

We remove illegals from Highsec!

No miner is too small…

You can do a miner today!

They say the same stuff to me.

I don’t have to do it alone.

Yes sir!

Now, that’s just not appropriate…

Calm down miners.

Populus Prime > and you continue to kill each other in the ass

Three Timing Felix

In EvE Online, love is risky.

Recently, Felix got in trouble.

Apparently, he made his new girl CEO.

SheHe took everything!

What a dunce.

I hope they are happy together.

Meanwhile, I feel betrayed.

Felix has been lying to me for a long time.

He never sent those flowers.

Instead, he sent them to my friend.

He even called herhim a princess!

Wtf?

Felix also went after my alts.

You know what kind of man does that?

He went through my whole channel.

Felix only wanted one thing from me.

He acted like he would buy me a nice meal.

What girl doesn’t love grilled Matari?

However, men always want something else.

Goodbye Felix.

To be continued…

Some dogs just can’t stay away.


Highsec Miner Grab Bag #254

On Loop: Shoot the Miner

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #253

Occasionally, we read old mail.

The people stay in touch.

I don’t mind.

Many write from beyond the grave.

They haunt my friends.

The dead love to rattle their chains.

They often feel wronged.

Don’t mess with a gangster mommy.

Miners also mail my alts!

I should write that one back…

I’ve got unread mail to and from people that no longer exist.

I have correspondence with permabanned has-beens.

Those losers sure have a lot to cry about.

Oh well!

Every miner has something to say.

Some miners just spam.

Others beg for mercy.

I am so glad/sorry that happened to your Viper?

Don’t invade Highsec!

In EvE Online, trash talk has consequences.

F.L.Y.S.A.F.E.