Princess Aiko – Page 96 – ‎James 315 Space

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #229

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #228

It happens to the best of us.

Sometimes, a miner wants to talk.

Jayce Orti lost a Retriever.

He sent this music video (twice), expressing sensitive feelings.

I hope he calms down.

I prefer positive language.

Some people just love to eat spiders.

I can think of worse fates.

Regardless, miners sure seem to like me.

I enjoy their little messages.

It’s a love-hate relationship.

It’s hard to figure out what I really want.

I’ve left some clues on my website.

Here’s a clue.

I like pen pals.

Tell me what you really think…

I’m here for you.

You are here for me.

I’m always watching.

My friends are everywhere.

They send me secret messages.

I’m never alone.

You don’t want to annoy me.

That would be a mistake.

Assurance

I can officially assure you…

…pay me 30 million isk, and you won’t have to worry about CODE.

You can enjoy Safety.

There’s no point in resistance.

That would be futile.

simpleton Cowards couldnt fight their way out of a wet paper bag.

I wonder what they think of me.

I bet we could be friends.

If not, oh well.

Regardless, I have a vision for the future of Highsec.

It’s going to be a SAFE space for ganking minorities.

Everyone else is hereby evicted.

I think you know why.

Go on, get out!

Great!

What a wonderful blog.

Miners deserve my special attention.

I have a plan for them.

I’m having a great time!

I do well by doing good.

I’m teaching miners how to stay SAFE.

Everybody is eager and ready to help.

Even CCP is pitching in.

I’m glad the miners are so happy.

Highsec life has never been so profitable.

Spaceships are just falling from orbit!

They even come from faraway Nullsec, just to enjoy the luxurious bounty.

Good job Aiko!

The Best Revenge, Part 96

The Best Revenge, Part 1
The Best Revenge, Part 78

Previously, in the Princess Diaries… Now then, dear Reader, where were we? It all began a long time ago, when a Highsec Orca got into a standoff with ~~Kalooooronooed~~ Kalorned. Before long, Tweeps and Princess Aiko and Dolphin Don hailed aiva naali as the Grand High Lord of the Delve. Indeed, The Mittani personally appointed aiva (now avia, aka ‘lil bullet, aka Gooninatius Reximus, aka He Who Knocks) as the lead abstract theorecraftitician of the entire Swarm. Yea, and did ~~aiva~~ avia solemnly prophesize the double trading of Vily, who did thusly conspire with the WHORE Elise Randolph.

With TEST reeling before his counteroffensive, the suppercomputer began playing nth+n+2th-dimensional chess, in hyperspace.

Meanwhile, in the secret Goon headquarters, Aiko and avia developed the Goon Bounty Board, as a means to ensure that unemployed drones were able to find suitable work to ensure the survival of the hive.

At every moment, avia is watching his Swarmlings, dutifully guiding them toward victory.

It was avia who snuffed out Snuffed Out.

It was avia who kept our FCs safely hidden away.

It was avia who taught James 315 how to minerbump.

It all started with a modest vow to utterly destroy Pandemic Horde.

It became the best revenge.

To be continued…

Just wait…

Miners make a lot of special requests.

They simply don’t understand what is happening.

They are worried about the future.

Who will help the miners?

The poor little things…

I know exactly what they need.

We are going to cleanse the galaxy.

If you don’t read my blog, you are dead already.

The rest of you, well, you better send me money.

No refunds!

Safe Space

Miners are having a rough time.

There’s got to be a better way to grind…

Maybe they should stop trespassing in my asteroid preserve?

Remember miners, Highsec is a safe space.

Just obey the law, and everything will be fine.

It’d be a real shame, if something happened.

You never know…

Bee careful!

More Fs

We know miners are bots, but they think we are rats.

Mean mean meanies.

Please don’t send me to a brothel.

Mining sure is hard, with Trigs and Gankers in local.

It’s especially difficult, when you are AFK.

You better look at your computer screen.

Someone is trying to kill you.

Someone wants your money.

Just calm down.

We wish you all the best.

So please obey the law…

…and send us your money.

See ya!

Honorable Mentions

Recently, on the forums, they were discussing the greatest EVE players of all time.

Consensus naturally formed around myself, with Brisc Rubal in second place.

Let’s consider some other honorable mentions.

Elite PvE miners, who don’t shoot back, they are the real heroes – right?

The poor miners struggle daily, to ensure CCP doesn’t get any funding.

Why pay for PLEX, when you can just grind?

Mining is a truly honorable profession.

Well, at least, it’s relaxing…

The miners are content.

Without them, we’d have no game.

Without us, they’d have no game.

We are like two peas in a pod.

I’m glad to see miners are still out there.

I just want to meet them all.

What would we do without miners?

Cheers!

Kelroth, Part 6

Kelroth, Part 1

Previously, in the Princess Diaries… Kelroth bought a C7 wormhole, with all the keepstars, and a lifetime VIP mining permit. However, when evil traders infiltrated DarkStar Industries, Kelroth knew he had a CODE. spy on the inside. It didn’t take long for his new friends to identify the secret agent. It was none other than Kelroth’s own security chief, the Bible thumping flat Earther Brutus.