Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
We’ve met Barnso before.
TLDR
As you may recall, Hawk ganked him.
Tsk tsk.
He used this opportunity to review my CODE.
I don’t screenshot every isk.
After that, Hawk ganked him again!
PLOT TWIST: Barnso was on a secret Safety mission…
To be continued…
Miners love to post about me.
I guess I’m famous.
Wow, that sounds fascinating…
Thanks for the input, Carebear Federation!
ReeeeEEE!
Oh no!
Highsec salt is plentiful.
I have quite a few fans.
That’s right.
Year #5 – still going strong.
Hey, somebody noticed!
Haha, yup, they got me figured out.
Oh noooo!
Facts.
Another 2009 newplayer crybaby.
What does that even mean?
That’s right.
We discriminate against miners.
It’s like shooting terrorists in Call of Duty.
Well, that’s an interesting counterpoint…
Gankers are like Rushlock, but with PvP.
I actually have quite a few fans.
It’s like a comedy club in Highsec.
Apparently, the Redditeers began arguing.
I hope they calm down.
I do wish my mother paid more attention to me.
Sick burn, bro!
At least I’m the best player in the history of the game.
Miners like to roleplay.
I know what they want.
I’m a total b.
Carebears think I’m their alpha mommy.
In fact, they are another species altogether.
It all makes sense in EvE Online.
I call it Incels Online.
Carebears need to stay SAFE.
At least I’m having fun.
Amazing content.
That’s right.
That’s right!
Listening to: he’s kinda… cute
Gurrr hathathat.
Cringlewolf?
Keep it cringy, Brave.
That’s right.
Stay SAFE!
Hey there.
It’s not easy being a miner.
They seem to lose everything.
That sucks.
Indeed.
That’s right!
Oh well.
Cya…
We’ve met Archy before.
Archy was the guy who funded Aikotown.
After swiping his credit card, Archy got bored.
He recycled his Jita trade alt, into a ganking alt.
PvP, not wealth accumulation, is the real game.
Isk can buy ships, but it can’t buy fun!
That’s right.
Abduleljudiopalestino tried to scam Archy.
We gave Abdul some legal advice.
However, he immediately tried another poverty scam.
Sometimes, you have to start small.
…then you can get the rest.
Another satisfied customer.
I was ready to make delivery.
He never did complete his delivery payments.
It was a real learning experience.
I wish him all the best in EvE Online.
=PLOT TWIST=
Abduleljudiopalestino > scammers veteran im fucking noob
Abdul is not a new player, he’s just a dumb vet.
Newbro Archy outplayed a guy with years of experience.
Nice job Archy.
It’s a frequently asked question.
I’m fine, thanks.
Miners don’t value their time.
They aren’t even real miners.
I’m a princess.
I know what miners need.
Afterward, I allow them to grieve.
This is their chance to reflect.
What a nice chat.
Bye-e!
Miners often encounter gankers.
They especially notice me.
I am in the zone.
I try to give them what they want.
They like that.
Sometimes, they get a little upset.
They are frustrated with their lack of progress.
That’s fine with me.
I’m a princess.
Cya!
This story begins in outer space.
Newbro Rais Wilding mined around, and found out.
Mining wasn’t very fun.
Fortunately, Safety officers intervened.
After his arrest, Rais gave a speech.
He urged other miners to obey the law.
Rais is now a motivational speaker.
Cheerzah!
That’s right.
I’m a real Highsec escort.
That’s right.
Recently, miner Nigel ran into trouble.
He’s just a 2015 newbro.
So I agreed to assist.
I love to help the little guys.
Apparently, the mining pacifists lost a control tower?
No money? No problem!
Just send me your stuff.
It was his idea!
I’m glad we came to an agreement.
Cheerzah brav!
He just needs to pay.
That’s right.
There was just one problem.
I’ve done this before.
It works well.
I call it the 30 40 70 rule.
It works like a charm.
Later that day…
I change people’s lives!
There’s a life lesson here.
=FOLLOW UP=
