Hey, I’m Aiko.
People love my best EVE Online blog.
They tell me all the time.
That’s right!
I know what men want.
What do you think I want?
A girl has needs.
It’d be a real shame if you had a Safety incident.
Nobody likes a poor.
Right?
Cheers!
Category: Always!
Perfect
Ashterothi was streaming today, with a vibrant discussion of griefing and harassment. Not surprisingly, he concluded that I am perfect.
Anyone who suggests otherwise is trying to scam you.
Don’t listen to salty carebears who cry.
Those people are mental, in real-life.
You don’t want to be one of them, do you?
Come to a FREE Safety. meetup and accept TRUTH.
Meanwhile, Spanish miner Gwen Hekki has been wrestling with demons.
The loss of her Venture was upsetting, and she cried.
Gwen sought revenge, by shooting empty pods.
She has written about these struggles on her own blog.
One day, Gwen realized an important truth: “ser victima sólo era el resultado del descuido o ver a EVE Online como un Farm Village espacial.” To be a victim, is only the result of carelessness, and treating EVE like Space Farmville.
Bait Freighter
I am live blogging the Why Was I Ganked? channel.
Kethiera Imanin lost a freighter, and she’s not mad.
She’s a space lawyer.
Someone made a serious mistake…
…and there are going to be consequences.
It was actually a bait freighter.
She tricked us all.
Now we are getting reported.
We are in big trouble.
Kethiera is a big fish, and she’s reporting to bigger fish.
What will we do?
Watch out gankers…
Don’t fall for a bait freighter!
*****LIVE UPDATE*****
Kethiera is famous now.
She loves her soapbox.
What a goofus.
Right?
CHAT LETS GO (pop off)
My alliance is doing well.
You love my -10 stats.
Lately, I’ve been expanding.
Highsec gankers are doing better than nullsec titanbears.
We are a top tier alliance.
Some people are salty about our success.
The wraiths are hungry.
Never go full Ward.
You’ll look stupid (and salty)!
Some people gank Orcas, and some people are Bingo cards.
It must suck to know I have no life, and can play EVE every day.
If you are gonna trash talk me, make sure not to trash talk yourself.
Hm!
Viirilithizu always knows how to cheer me up.
Previously, Ward wanted killmails…
Now, he doesn’t want them!
Does Ward sound like a salty meme to you?
I wonder if he will stop ranting?
I wish I knew how to do real PvP.
Thanks for helping me write a blog post.
Stay in touch!
I’m glad you are content.
Seriously though…
Meltdowns are forever.
Okay?
I have my doubts!
Game Over
Miners need attention.
They are usually poor sports.
Crabs aren’t the smartest, even in real-life.
They are rarely calm.
Carebears are slow learners…
…but they are learning.
I’m Princess Aiko.
I’m so elite.
Who’s your mommy?
That’s right.
fu princess
evan mclean (aka not Kalle) has a special message for yours truly.
I am the greatest capsuleer.
Someday, they will make an Aiko statue.
loyalanon said he’s proud of me, bro.
I’m just the best.
Everyone agrees.
Only plebs get unironically salty with me.
Some people are idiots.
Everybody else knows the truth.
Cheers!
Boris Goes Bananas, Part 3
Previously, in EVE Online… a miner died (thrice).
Boris was dismayed, because his lesbian aunt is a Highsec ganker.
These are actual screenshots of EVE Online gameplay.
Like many miners, Boris doesn’t care about mining.
Losers just love to explain how they still don’t care.
I’m happy to listen.
I am Aiko, Princess of the Forest…
…and Slut of Copenhagen.
I look forward to hearing from you.
What a game…
We will get to Paradise – and you will all just die!
V.V.Putin
Boris sure trolled me.
I’m a scary girl!
Boris Goes Bananas, Part 2
Previously, in James 315 Space… Boris lost another Retriever.
:TRIGGER WARNING:
EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT (AND RACISM) IN EVE ONLINE
Aveve needs to learn how to take clear screenshots.
Doesn’t that look better?
Regardless, this is good stuff.
In EvE Online, Boris roleplays as a Christian miner.
He is persecuted, by homosexual terrorists.
Someday, if he can afford a boat, he will fight the dog fuckers.
I don’t want Boris to get banned. I find this entertaining!
Boris, you crazy Russian!
To be continued…
Boris Goes Bananas
We now return to our regularly scheduled programming.
Boris does not tolerate fools, or bad prostates.
He knows this is a video game.
Unfortunately, Boris lost three barges, in outer space.
In a game like EVE Online, this is a blunder.
Boris was about to get serious.
To be continued…
Nope
Yesterday, we stared into the abyss.
Was this the end of the galaxy?
Novus Ordo antigankers tried to report gankers for pulling, but the EVE community came together and defended our Highsec traditions.
All is well!
We celebrated by exploit dunking in Uedama.
Here’s a video!
In other news, an Orca had a Safety incident.
Safety inspectors are investigating.
Let’s examine the SRP request.
Ah, I found the problem…
You were trying to run your own business.
Safety first, always!
