Category: Faith

Slow Boil

I’m a real Highsec escort.

That’s right.

Recently, miner Nigel ran into trouble.

He’s just a 2015 newbro.

So I agreed to assist.

I love to help the little guys.

Apparently, the mining pacifists lost a control tower?

No money? No problem!

Just send me your stuff.

It was his idea!

I’m glad we came to an agreement.

Cheerzah brav!

He just needs to pay.

That’s right.

There was just one problem.

I’ve done this before.

It works well.

I call it the 30 40 70 rule.

It works like a charm.

Later that day…

I change people’s lives!

There’s a life lesson here.

=FOLLOW UP=

Venture Standings – NOVEMBER

It’s that time of year.

We are here to help.

Without further ado, the November rankings…

As we head into December, CASTOLE generously motivates the other contestants, by adding an additional 25 billion isk to the PRIZE FUND. Wow, thank you CASTOLE! Remember, December is the month of kill doubling, so earn your BONUS points fast with that holiday spirit! It’s not too late to bounce back to the highest levels imaginable. This is your chance to become a TOP TIER elite Venture destroyer! Of course, if you can’t gank a Venture yourself, feel free to send isk to those who can!!

That’s right!

That’s right!

How to Sell a Mining Permit #423

First, chat with a miner.

I like to be direct.

He didn’t take the hint.

Mine around and find out!

PLOT TWIST: That’s just my alt.

So the miner contacted a supervisor…

“No miner can be lawfully ganked unless they are given a full advance warning, with a 60 second truce allowing them to dock up safely.”

No warning, in my Halaima?

He was informed, but ok…

I keep my Highsec safe.

I value my friends.

I love to help.

This is a good racket.

What a great space job.

That’s right.

Read all about it!

That’s right…

Everything according to plan.

Just another day in EvE Online.

Amazing content.

My ‘friend’ never corrected me.

In fact, the little parrot was scamming me.

Everyone loves a free SRP.

They apparently see it coming.

I play the game my way.

This is not my first time.

It adds up.

It works!

=BONUS ROUND=

I almost forgot.

Nobody likes a delinquent miner.

A few moments later…

Another satisfied customer.

=POSTSCRIPT=

Eventually, Andreska bought a new ship…

It never reached the ice.

xD

=THE END=

In the CODE.

Next, they go to Why Was I Ganked?

True story.

Then they get bonus offers.

Another satisfied repeat customer.

He also ordered a new Bowhead.

Of course, there is a delivery fee.

That’s right.

What a happy miner.

Everything was perfectly routine.

He sent me and my alts a bunch of isk.

He even bought a mining stamp.

There’s a process?

What a plan.

Didn’t he already pay?

I’ve done it quite a few times.

PLOT TWIST: There is no file.

DOUBLE PLOT TWIST: No database either.

Jamie is just a working alt.

Nobody likes a space lawyer.

Another delinquent miner.

Eventually, he found me again.

I guess we can resolve this.

Sometimes, they try to negotiate.

I’m happy to explain.

Pleasure doing business…

Jormags wound up mumbling to himself in Jita.

Thanks for playing.

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #248

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #247

Nobody can read it all.

An ocean of salt, decades deep.

In EvE Online, you can be anything you want.

Some people are crybabies.

I’m just a tabloid journalist, in outer space.

I’m also a social worker, and your new high princess (hi there).

By many accounts, I’m the best.

I run a real bad corp.

It’s an intergalactic cartel.

My friends are happy to help.

We go way back.

I’ll see you on the gates.

Cheerzah brav.