

Hey there.


That’s right.


Miners have a lot of questions.


That’s fine.



They are allowed to wonder…

They won’t like the answers.








Calm down miners.


Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Hey there.
That’s right.
Miners have a lot of questions.
That’s fine.
They are allowed to wonder…
They won’t like the answers.
Calm down miners.
Listening to: AO Downfall
Trigger Warning: Blatant Racism in EvE Online
Hey there.
We’ve all heard the rumors.
Absolute Order is absolutely racist.
These are real screenshots from EvE Online.
Oh wow, ok.
See what I mean?
We have no tolerance for casual breakfast Klingons.
They cannot be reasoned with.
It’s not just the racism.
Absolute Order is absolutely mental.
We know how to deal with this.
Just bump them all.
Governor Lee done goofed.
Consequences will never be the same.
We’ve met before.
Haven’t we Mr Governor Lee?
That’s right.
We go way back.
Wayback.
What will MrLee think of next?
Miners love the attention.
DillonEllett > imma keep drinkin and just say i know the life yea lol , and your the osmon boss
DillonEllett > sup im about that life lol what stops you from the med fish i see your kb ,miners yes easy fish “big” kill them all afk or bot / why do you not kill the l4 – i get it if you save/alt your shit ,fun times right , so if not AND IF THIS IS YOUR MAIN FUN , im just lookin to be you know a spy , this is what i do when my boys are off so your here always im around maybe i fit passive and scan fits and you know they sit still ?
DillonEllett > hello?
DillonEllett > you put me on hold fker lol
DillonEllett > 15 mins i rl stuff i do have a lady and kid but i got that then down the street for drink brb sorry
Aiko Danuja > haha have a drink on me
That’s why they never shut up.
Welcome to EvE Online.
This is not a paid advertisement.
It’s not an easy game.
It feels good to bully Highsec miners.
It’s a lot of fun.
I find it amusing.
I’ve even met some interesting men.
Cheerzah brav.
Hey there.
Each day brings new friends.
Yesterday, I helped Lady Krabs purchase 12 mining permits.
Then she reported me to the SSR.
The next morning, Mrs. Krabs woke up to reality.
Op success.
Another content subscriber.
Now the Krabs ladies can mine in peace.
Osmon is also the home of my beloved Cultural Center.
I can’t keep a secret.
He’s a real people person.
I’m glad everyone is happy.
That’s right.
Feel free to send your isk.
Works for me.
I wonder how things are going in Osmon?
Sounds like things are going great.
Thanks for the free isk, bro.
I’m glad we are friends.
Hey there.
I’m a subject matter expert (SME).
Welcome to Part II of my FanFest Presentation.
Miners have been stalking gankers for years.
Sometimes, they just want to say hi.
Believe it or not, there are women in the galaxy.
I’m doing great, btw.
You just can’t win Incels Online.
Some people can’t decide if I’m a guy or a girl.
Bro…
In game or out of game.
Ain’t no man getting attention like this.
If I ‘win’ EvE, at least you’ll know why.
Regardless, boys only want one thing from me.
Whatever I am, they love it.
Honestly, some of them are just plain crazy.
He wants me to commit suicide, in real life.
Blocking him doesn’t work.
I’ve blocked him at least 100 times.
Ain’t I a woman?
(yes he drew that)
Here’s the same guy, a month later.
Same guy, twenty minutes later.
Three minutes later.
Another month later.
See what I mean?
Oh look, another antiganker.
These plebs are obsessed with me, in real life.
I deserve it – right?
Oh boy, it never stops.
The diagnosis is clear.
I’m gonna blog.
Some of this is funny.
Most of it is cringe.
Some of it is mental.
All of it is batshit crazy.
Oh man, I really missed out.
What???
Uh…
Anyways…
No!
To be continued…
=Trigger Warning: EvE Online=
Miners have a lot to say.
Previously, on my best EvE Online blog.
Miners think about me a lot.
It’s a competition, to see who obsesses the most.
Yep, I’m lookin great.
[ 2024.08.25 22:15:53 ] Kathus > onlyganks.com
I don’t mind a little flattery.
However, antigankers go too far.
They take it from awkward to creepy.
It gets a little weird.
I’m not looking for a boyfriend in EvE Online.
Sorry to disappoint.
Uh…
Wtf is a sparrow?
I’m not a tsundere! Hmph.
I actually haven’t read all these mails.
See, that’s where it gets crazy…
Bro…
We aren’t going to Iceland together.
Steven, my guy… you mail me all the time.
To be continued…
Yesterday, we saw the burden of alliance leadership.
Voluminous unsolicited correspondence.
Oh boy…
Thanks for the intel.
I get lot of inquiries.
It’s not a cult. We are a congregational Fellowship of Friendos.
Next time, we’ll talk about sexual harassment in EvE Online.
That’s right.
That’s not gonna happen.
Like wtf.
Yep, that’s an antiganker.
Oh, hey there.
I guess it’s mailtime.
Some miners are not upset.
They are quite calm.
Some miners roleplay as notaminers.
No mining in Delve!
That’s right.
This Orca had plenty of ‘no’ warning…
It was all a setup! The miner exposed CCP’s evil ways.
I’m the most upvoted person in EvE forum history.
Unlike some people, I actually play EvE Online.
I get way too much email (unlike James, I don’t have a cute secretary).
It is funny tho.
A mining sniper, and not even his first time…
Bro has been doing that longer than I’ve played.
Send me one billion isk, buy 5 get one free.
Boy, I got so much game up in here.
Wow, just wow.
I can’t wait to hear more.
That’s right.
I won’t tolerate griefing in my alliance.
Sure thing, little buddy.
Ah, but I’m also cute.
That’s my isk/hr.
Hey, I’m having fun)
In EvE Online, carebears are creepbears.
Everything has a price.
There’s only way to respond.
I sent IceyCreeper619 straight to Zboard.
Then I sent a bill, for a bill.
What a neat trick.
Get ganked, miner.
That’s right.
Every miner has a dream.
It’s always nonsense.
Don’t forget to buy your mining permits.
Mr Boon is the antiganker who mines in Silen.
He keeps it classy in EvE Online.
Every carebear has a story to tell.
That’s right.
Some miners have a lot to say.
What’s ol Phek Phukking crying about?
Oh, I ganked him, I remember now…
… and I bet that’s his alt (double ganked).
Ok, gotta go.
o7 space capsuleers!