Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Miners are bad at EvE Online.
So we purify them unto extirpation.
Recently, Blood Raiders visited ruination upon the J-bears.
Vulpecula Volans gave a riveting war speech.
His fleet was overwhelmed by a Childrens Orphanage Charity event.
It was a terrible slaughter.
The time for training was over.
Afterward, I returned to Highsec.
It was the same as always.
That’s right.
That’s right!
I’m winning a game called EvE Online.
They win by losing.
I find this acceptable.
Highsec is a strange place…
Sometimes, they get an attitude.
So we have to put them down.
We are all having fun.
I hope everybody is having fun?
That’s right.
That’s right!
o7 capsuleers…
80 trillion isk destroyed…
Let’s have some content context.
When I joined the once mighty CODE. alliance, in 2018, that alliance’s total isk destroyed was less than 70 trillion. By the end of 2019, it reached 80 trillion. However, with greater velocity, the mighty Safety. alliance has eclipsed that old CODE. killboard. I now stand not merely as equal to James 315, at his peak, but higher yet even still! From this point onward, comparisons between CODE. and Safety. become circular, since most of CODE’s subsequent killboard was driven by individuals who are now members of Safety (namely, myself). With time, I anticipate exceeding the entire sum total of CODE., but beyond this point I am merely competing against myself.
I’m doing great, and I feel great.
Many write to express support and appreciation…
I’m the best!
Kazry was a bad boy.
Kazry > i ran with the bandidos for a number of years
He sure talked a lot of trash.
He kinda liked me.
Then he went to the big house.
It’s been a long time!
Welcome back, big guy!
Plot twist: He still likes me…
I’m doing better than ever!
Everybody loves Aiko.
That’s right.
I’m the best!
Stay out of trouble…
Welcome to my clickbait.
James 315 was a great guy, no doubt. More of a blogger, than an actual EvE player, but still pretty cool. However, when the greatest PvP player in the history of the game began to eclipse him, she also began to notice where he was wrong and not quite right.
Indeed, James forgot one of his own systems! Recently, in my quest to obtain Intaki Spiced Tea, imagine my surprise when I realized not only does Intaki exist, but no CODE. agent had ever visited it before. I felt like a true explorer as I claimed the system in MY name!
That’s right.
For good measure, I snagged another quick frag.
Shocking as this might be, I can’t help but acknowledge a subtle truth which careless readers might miss. Not only am I the best, I’m also slightly misleading (some might even say dishonest). Of course, when James wrote his post, Intaki was not actually a Highsec system. So perhaps I am guilty of sensationalist exaggeration, but who can blame me? It was not James who came to Intaki and ganked two exhumers – it was ME. In Intaki, the miners can truthfully say, “Before the CODE. there was AIKO!”
Many have thus begun to notice me, learning two things: 1) I appear to be the best, and 2) Even if I’m not, I’m still pretty darn great. Even my detractors acknowledge my success.
Compared to James 315, I’m pie in the sky!
Here’s a video that made me laugh.
Is EvE’s #1 alltime greatest a fraud??
I don’t need to explain what I do or why, and I certainly don’t worry about the salt and tears of AI generated solobear commentators who don’t even play the game. To be quite frank, all the greatest players in EvE Online are always engaged in some sort of padding. For us, that’s a game unto itself, and whether you are whoring on keepstars, jump freighters, dread brawls, or dunking your own alts – it’s all part of the game. However, what happens when you strip away the padding, what’s left?
“Aiko Danuja… The Legend… one of the most famous outlaws in New Eden. That is real… Aiko Danuja is ALWAYS your OFFICIAL High Princess… Aiko Danuja Is the Best Bee… The top of the solo leaderboard is YOURS… To be fair to the princess, the rest of the record is real… the LEGEND is real…”
Strip away the deceit, and you are left with one obvious truth: Aiko Danuja is the greatest player in the history of the game!
Hey, here’s a ‘real’ solo kill…
He even bought a permit…
With kills like that, I can afford to pad!
My name is Aiko Danuja.
Everybody thinks I’m great.
Objectively, I’m the best player in the history of EvE Online.
I was voted “coolest hottest best of the best”!
I also made an elite top tier PvP alliance!
That’s right.
Just read these customer testimonials!
That’s right!
Many miners purchase multiple permits!
I think it’s kinda funny…
o7 capsuleers!
I’m the greatest player in the history of EvE Online.
Some people are just bad at this game.
They will never learn.
Have you learned anything?
I’ve learned that miners deserve to die.
They don’t seem to mind.
O7 CAPSULEERS!
Listening to: High-Sex Assassin
Do mining permits work?
Of course…
Mining permits are on sale now!
That’s right.
Make sure to obey the LAW!
o7 capsuleers…
=BEHIND THE SCENES=
=POINT AND COUNTERPOINT=
I’m doing great.
Not everybody is so fortunate.
It sucks being a miner.
Sometimes, it’s better to stop.
Don’t let this be you!
That’s right.
That’s right!
Miners notice me.
I’m a legend in my own time.
They often have something to say.
Sometimes, they are less philosophical.
I always tell them to buy a permit.
I think they like me.
I consider them fans.
That’s right.
That’s not right.
Welcome to EvE Online!
…but wait, there’s more.
I will always be me.
Here is some wisdom.
Miners are idiots.
o7 capsuleers!
