Category: Geography

Woe to 1DQ

Well, hello there!

All gunkers are groons. Garrrrar etc.

We lost everything in Delve, so now we hide in Highsec.

Lin Sa La had a cunning plan.

Could she spam the gunks away?

Like all miners, she needs guidance.

These are actual screenshots from EvE Online!

The temper tantrum gradually subsided.

James 315 would have loved this miner.

I’m just a despotic totalitarian tyrant.

Across the galaxy, miners yearn for the return of their Saviour.

Will he ever keep them safe?

Doubt.

Oh well…

Cheerzah bravs!

Hole v Hole

Nice greetings are on order, friend…

…and now our feature presentation.

*****

Wormholer Jeff encountered Wormholer Akrich, in Highsec.

Jeff naturally began collecting rent.

Akrich made a partial payment, but things went sideways.

Jeff faced a perplexing dilemma.

What to do?

Meanwhile, the miner began throwing n-bombs.

Really?

Surprisingly (not really), Akrich isn’t a new player.

Akrich blamed his son.

All Jeff wanted was a killmail.

He sent Akrich one final warning.

Once again, Akrich blamed his son.

The end.

Mad Maddi

Maddi was not off to a good start.

It was depressing.

However, this wasn’t the end…

Maddi Rush > im gonna go slit my wrists again
Maddi Rush > come kill me in real life please
Maddi Rush > i dont have the courage
Maddi Rush > i need help just kill me in real life
Apo Bong > Please don’t talk like that, it’s not funny
Maddi Rush > man this isnt a joke

It went on and on…

Maddi Rush > omg im new i was literally going to sell all of that bc im trying to learn i cant even start a new char bc the start missions r already done fk me
Apo Bong > Your story the last time was a bit different
Maddi Rush > [REDACTED] ave toronto ont canada plz kill me
Maddi Rush > plz some here actually come kill me
Maddi Rush > i gave my real address
Maddi Rush > google it its real plz come
Sargon Of Amerish > i live in isanamo
Maddi Rush > ill pay for ur plane ticket
Maddi Rush > u can kill me quick and do whatever with my body ik ppl r sickos with women
Maddi Rush > is anyone actually on the way ive unlocked my door come on in

It’s a bit much, don’t you think?

Maddi Rush > why cant i just help ppl
Maddi Rush > thats actually what i do
Maddi Rush > i help new ppl
Maddi Rush > u are why ppl like me quit and then new ppl dont want to play bc no one helps them
Maddi Rush > like i dont want tot help myself in real life i just want to die and i cant figure out a way im such a coward
Maddi Rush > i havent gone to the store in weeks…. im hoping i die of starvation in my sleep but then i can barely move and im just stuck infront of computer
Maddi Rush > apo is the reason maddi rush killled herself in game and it will be glorious way to die… and i will take these pills and drift off watching the space

Ok, that’s enough of that…

Maddi Rush > im going to kill myself now
Maddi Rush > watch it on the news on CP24 toronto
Maddi Rush > so what u guys want to talk about these last moments
Maddi Rush > my mom drugged me with meds to get blood tested that sell actually then sold the meds to the nieghbours for months
Maddi Rush > i was gonna do a stratios build and finally be apart of the gang
Maddi Rush > goodbye

Fortunately, Maddi finally got that dream Stratios…

…followed by a dreamy Vindi…

I sure hope Maddi is feeling better…

EVE System > Channel changed to Local : Amarr
Roan Pico > Courier Kor-Azor – Amarr route: Amarr >> Neesher (927 m³) Nare >> Neesher (150000 m³) Neesher >> Amarr (2245 m³)
Neijas > You seem to have very special needs Maddi Rush
Maddi Rush > say that to me directly and watch what happens
Neijas > How do I say it to you more directly?
Neijas > Seems like you’re having some intellectual challenges
Maddi Rush > seem like u are the one projecting something there
Maddi Rush > keyboard warrior over here lol
NoLSolid > Kill: Maddi Rush (Stratios)
Maddi Rush > yea i was afk
Contracting Alt13 > Jita >> Amarr (1034 m³)
Contracting Alt13 > Maddi Rush haul this and shut up
Jno Aubrey > Alternatively, you could just biomass yourself
Maddi Rush > u just told me to kill myself enjoy that ban
Neijas > Oh no! Please take everything personal after you gaslight all of Amarr
TorJansleep > HyperNet offer: Hel Cheapest HyperNet offer: Hel 6.88b HyperNet offer: Wyvern 137m */512

Um…

Mister McGibblets Cries More

Previously, Mister McGibblets died…

Woah, I don’t want to talk to a toxic miner…

However, he said something objectionable…

….autopilot???

I wanted him to stay safe.

Oh good, he isn’t mad!

Uh…

So his dogs are better at EvE than he is?

It’s the “woe is me, my kid is sick” scam.

After the trauma dump, I wanted a refund.

It’s that easy!

Even the dumbest miner can figure it out…

This is why antigankers will never win!

What do you think?

Will McGibblets get his Orca back?

Do I look like a girl who lies through a smile?

I’ve never seen a more honest face!