Ready or not!
Miners don’t like PvP.
It’s way too organized.
That’s fine with me.
We are all friends here.
Welcome to the team.
That’s right.
Zwonkz Gets Zwonkd
Category: Witchcraft
Barnso: BONUS ROUND
We’ve met Barnso before.
TLDR
As you may recall, Hawk ganked him.
Tsk tsk.
He used this opportunity to review my CODE.
I don’t screenshot every isk.
After that, Hawk ganked him again!
PLOT TWIST: Barnso was on a secret Safety mission…
To be continued…
Feliz Navidad!
I guess it’s that time of year.
That’s right.
That’s also right.
Of course, some people lack holiday spirit.
What are your New Year’s resolutions?
I’m probably gonna have fun.
I even learned a cute new spell.
Cheerzahcadabbra!
Another happy miner.
I love to help.
xD
Where will he go next?
Yria is Syria, Part 2
Silent Company had a lot to say.
So I sent bumpers after them.
Eons ago, James 315 was a bumper.
One bump can change the course of a fleet.
It took John E McCain, just four days to subdue Greater Ottawasa.
Local went empty.
On Day 5, Phoebe Beeblebrox tried to break the blockade.
Georgia B Dixie (aka John E Normus) was on the case.
The illegal miners were escorted away.
An empty belt is a compliant belt.
To maintain tranquility, Georgia would cloak after each bump.
Spooky!
To be continued…
ArchyZavr Sells A Mining Permit
We’ve met Archy before.
Archy was the guy who funded Aikotown.
After swiping his credit card, Archy got bored.
He recycled his Jita trade alt, into a ganking alt.
PvP, not wealth accumulation, is the real game.
Isk can buy ships, but it can’t buy fun!
That’s right.
Abduleljudiopalestino tried to scam Archy.
We gave Abdul some legal advice.
However, he immediately tried another poverty scam.
Sometimes, you have to start small.
…then you can get the rest.
Another satisfied customer.
I was ready to make delivery.
He never did complete his delivery payments.
It was a real learning experience.
I wish him all the best in EvE Online.
=PLOT TWIST=
Abduleljudiopalestino > scammers veteran im fucking noob
Abdul is not a new player, he’s just a dumb vet.
Newbro Archy outplayed a guy with years of experience.
Nice job Archy.
Recruiting Newbros
That’s right.
Xris was lost and alone.
Where would he go?
Xris was a real Highsec miner.
One day, Jesus rescued him.
Xris was born again.
All he needed was faith.
Xris finally found his home.
=BEHIND THE SCENES=
That’s right.
Them Again
Miners often encounter gankers.
They especially notice me.
I am in the zone.
I try to give them what they want.
They like that.
Sometimes, they get a little upset.
They are frustrated with their lack of progress.
That’s fine with me.
I’m a princess.
Cya!
Slow Boil
I’m a real Highsec escort.
That’s right.
Recently, miner Nigel ran into trouble.
He’s just a 2015 newbro.
So I agreed to assist.
I love to help the little guys.
Apparently, the mining pacifists lost a control tower?
No money? No problem!
Just send me your stuff.
It was his idea!
I’m glad we came to an agreement.
Cheerzah brav!
He just needs to pay.
That’s right.
There was just one problem.
I’ve done this before.
It works well.
I call it the 30 40 70 rule.
It works like a charm.
Later that day…
I change people’s lives!
There’s a life lesson here.
=FOLLOW UP=
SRP Claim #513-PA
Aiden Vail is a mining man.
Unfortunately, he fell behind on rent.
Consequently, he needs a new ship.
Fortunately, it was Black Friday!
He was a real ice aspirant.
Cool story bro!
Another 2007 newbro.
I naturally established an empathetic rapport.
This is a useful ability.
“The target must succeed on a DC 17 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed. The charmed target regards the vampire as a trusted friend, and is a willing target.”
“Harlots can be both brazen strumpets and haughty courtesans. In addition to the usual fare, the harlot is 15% likely to make something up, and 20% likely to be a thief.
Trust is the basis of every relationship.
Another satisfied customer.
I’m such a good soul.
That’s right.
PRO TIP: Jita has several unique stations!
Somehow, he discovered the blog.
I love to help.
He’s trying to scam me!
I’ve been here before.
It’s just basic math.
Vail asked his new friend for advice.
That’s right.
I explained everything.
That’s the best minigame in EvE Online.
Sad ending…
Life is full of new experiences.
Cheerzah!
Glambring FailHammer
Indeed.
Oh no!
He’s a real cat killer…
hehehehe
What a guy.
Two hours later…
Uh oh…
$$-BONUS ROUND-$$
I’m not messing around.
Well, I hope he’s sorry!
Cheerzah!
<=PLOT TWIST=>
That’s right.
