Tale of the Tombkeeper

Listening to: Dance the Night

Why??? How did the mighty CODE. alliance became a mere tomb for dead alts, cobwebs, and dusty bios?

What happened?

Super Pleb was there.

As director of NOL, he was universally despised.

Super opened the doors wide, but nobody joined.

The comments at Minerbumping are self-explanatory.

Super was always a disgrace.

So, on June 24, James 315 finally did it.

However, Super didn’t get the memo.

One day, a ghost came to visit.

Before James, John was executor of the alliance. Upon his return, he was not pleased by CODE. civil war.

As moderator of the minerbumping channel, Super was gleefully banning Aiko, and anyone who supported her.

With James gone, forever, even Super lamented the fact that nobody could do anything about Super.

The rest of the alliance was annoyed.

We wondered if Super was quite sane.

Naturally, John urged Super to calm down.

Super wanted the CODE. to be a tomb. However, corporation Big Willies PvP Madness wanted the alliance to be, well, an alliance that does something more than orbit a dead star.

With two active members in NOL, Super was threatened by the success of other ganking corps. He blamed James for this.

James had wisely allowed everyone to join another corporation, negating Super’s status as “cat’s meow” of NOL. Consequently, when Super banned people from Minerbumping, they could just join a different channel, or even a different alliance.

Which is exactly what happened.

Super embraced a helpless doom and gloom philosophy of inevitable stagnation and decay. Without James, gankers wanted new leadership, and the wound was deep. Super tried to stop the bleeding, but he only made things worse by draining blood from a desiccated corpse. Meanwhile, with every ban, Aiko grew stronger.

When he was done, there would be nobody left.

A dead alliance was better than one with Aiko.

Super repeated his mantra.

That felt good.

Super kissed the feet of his dead god.

This is the ‘leadership’ he provided.

Super wanted John to understand.

Super couldn’t accept reality, or Aiko. Clinically, he struggled to adjust his behaviour to suit various social contexts, and failed to engage in imaginative play with friends, continually falling back upon restricted repetitive patterns. Meanwhile, the death of James left a void, which would inevitably be filled.

Of course, everyone was concerned about the mails.

John encouraged Super to gank more.

Super didn’t want gankers in the ganking alliance.

A ganking alliance can’t survive without gankers!

Roleplayers aren’t real leaders.

Super was an idiot.

Without James, he had no hope for the future.

Would you join Pharaoah, in his tomb?

Super couldn’t wait!

What a goofus.

What a pleb!

For real.

Cheerzah!

That’s right!

lol

What would James say?

=BONUS ART=

Aiko and Super, by Alt 00

Baby, you can find me in Highsec
Diamonds under my eyes
Turn the rhythm up, don’t you wanna just
Come along for the ride?

Oh, my outfit so tight
You can see my heartbeat tonight
I can take the heat, baby, best believe
That’s the moment I shine

Don’t give a damn
When the night’s here, I do tears
Baby, you got no chance
When your heart breaks
I could dance, watch me dance
I’ll still keep the party runnin’, not one hair out of place

Lately, I’ve been moving close to the edge
Still be lookin’ my best
When the galaxy shakes
I stay on the beat, you can count on me
I ain’t missin’ no steps

I don’t play it safe (ooh)
Don’t you know about me? (Uh-huh)
Even when your tears are flowin’ like diamonds
I’ll still keep the party goin

CABO IS BACK:)

Previously, we met CABO4EvER.

CABO4EVER > 26 days 26 days..23 days…26 days.. have the time, dont worry:) i amwatching you ALL…every step…

He has a lot of alts.

Morghana Chase > jesus it’s busy today
Mr Lexon > yes pirates mining the Ice belt
Mr Lexon > and finaly thay had a kill

CABO claimed a draw.

KINGCABO > looks like even money to me
Learza Thiesant > Calm down Miner
KINGCABO > lmao you guys are so pathetic

CABO was not upset.

CABO4EVER > up yours, i willlmao
Learza Thiesant > you’re not a nice person
CABO4EVER > YOU ARE
Mr Lexon > dont intimidate me
Mr Lexon > dont y have other to do tha kill defenless miners?
Mr Lexon > probably acording to zkillboard the only thing y god at
Mr Lexon > so there y go, pirates all of you

Although, Mr Lexon was concerned.

Mr Lexon > curent pirates in system
Mr Lexon > I recond the hole corp is pirates…
Synthale > Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Mr Lexon > yes
CABOSOLDIERS > got my rum right next to me, lmao:)
Mr Lexon > Pirates mining the ice belt
Mr Lexon > all you do is KILL defensless miners
Mr Lexon > Next time, I bring a fleet.
Mr Lexon > also you pull concord
Mr Lexon > just need a video on you doing it…
Mr Lexon > your corp not war decable… so
Mr Lexon > there is limit to what I can do…

CABO was having a good time.

CABO4EVER > LETS PLAY…:)
CABO4EVER > 11 ROCKS TO GO
KINGCABO > WANT ME GONE, THINK AGAIN..:)
KINGCABO > game on, lmao
CABO4EVER > HEHEHEHEHE
CABOSOLDIERS > LETS ROCK….:)
CABO4EVER > REMEMBER: I AM 18 HRS ONLINE A DAY, LMAO
CABO4EVER > CABO IS BACK:)

CABO IS BACK:)

KINGCABO > WHAT YOU GONA BRING NOW, LMAO
KINGCABO > FIRST CATS, THEN..WHAT WAS THE OTHER ONE?
KINGCABO > NOW THALOS…AND NEXT?
KINGCABO > LMAO..
KINGCABO > COME ON..
KINGCABO > BRING IT ON..
CABOSOLDIERS > INSTEAD OF STANDING STILL AND COMPRESS, WILL JUMP AND COMPRESS, LMAO

EvE Online is a fun game.

CABOSOLDIERS > TNX GUYS
CABOSOLDIERS > DONT NEED TO JUMP 6 9 JUMP FOR ICE
CABOSOLDIERS > hit me again so i can jump again…
CABOSOLDIERS > whoooooooaaaaaaaa
CABOSOLDIERS > i am beginning to like this game, lol
CABOSOLDIERS > hehehehehehehe
CABOSOLDIERS > YOU R KEEPING MINERS AWAY, I GET ALL BELT FOR MY SELF, LMAO
You Blew Up > i like YOU CAPS LOCK talk… its really sane of you
CABOSOLDIERS > RIGHT HERE
CABOSOLDIERS > EXACTLY, I LIKE IT BLOWED UP, LMAO
CABO4EVER > HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA

Even Mr Lexon thinks CABO is crazy.

Mr Lexon > i GES YOU USE CAPITALES BECUSE YOU HAVE PROBLEM TO READ, SO I HELP YOU WITH CAPITAL
CABOSOLDIERS > INSTEAD OF STANDING STILL AND COMPRESS, WILL JUMP AND COMPRESS, LMAO
Learza Thiesant > Its ok. Stay Calm Miner
CABO4EVER > dont think so, ganker..:)


Neurotica 1, Part 9

Neurotica 1, Part 1

Previously, Erotica 1 was permabanned.

So he decided to buy CCP.

Before long, he began selling NFTs.

He thus invented “ironic” investing.

Why not invest with a scammer, for lolz?

Seems legit.

He could scam you, but he won’t – cuz it’s funny?

This sounds a lot like securities fraud.

Erotica just needed a little help.

A guaranteed return, eh?

This is when things got extra weird.

Uh…

So he decided to buy the Bahamas, and run for President.

One million dollars soon became a hundred billion.

Never go full batshit crazy.

Why not?

*smile and nod*

Bruh…

To be continued…


Trun Goes Potty

Trun had to pee.

I know, cuz he told me.

Gross!

He is not a happy miner.

Trun has a potty mouth.

What a naughty little goblok.

He pled not guilty.

However, he was found guilty by a jury of his superiors.

For one thing, he is guilty of antiganking.

He’s also guilty of needing help.

What a pitiful bear.

So naturally, he had a temper tantrum.

Crazy!

Oh… he had more to say.

The phantom provision lives on!

Wow, this miner still yapping?

Miners disgust me.

He concluded by gaslighting everyone…

…and urging us to have more sex.

He also threatened to report us.

I don’t think he likes us.

What a silly!

#FREE NEFFI

Listening to: Democracy Manifest

Well, hello there.

One day, the ban hammer slipped.

Neffi Cake (aka Luci Gotti) got banned, permanently, maybe.

Investigative Princess Aiko investigates…

Meanwhile, ISD Redacted was summoned to space court.

Likewise, Redline doesn’t care.

The other miners accuse CCP of international crimes.

Damning chatlogs prove CCP devs are Snuffed Out alts.

Of course, they deny everything.

So Neffi banned all the CCP/Snuff devs from his discord.

Seems legit.

The truth is out there.

Is Neffi going to prison?

No, that’s Adrian Vexier…

Neffi was banned for something else.

Why???

Fortunately, Neffi has contacted a higher power.

NATO forces are on high alert.

Reddits have been reddited…

… and unreddited.

CCP fought the law, and the law won.

Snuffed Out is going to the big house.

Neffi just wants to play EvE Online.

Will Hellmar unban his biggest fan?

This is a paid advertisement…

omg he’s soooo hot

Did Neffi do anything wrong?

Regardless, Neffi will continue trying to login.

As always, Highsec gankers stand with Neffi.

We want him to undock.

Just let him play, and we will take care of him…

Save the whales!

Cheerzah!

To be continued?

*BONUS CONTENT*
***BEHIND THE SCENES LIVEBLOG***