Category: Always!

Dear Diary,

Dear Diary,

Being the #1 PvP capsuleer in the galaxy, and the most beautiful woman, and the best blogger, and the greatest alliance leader, and the most wonderfulest Aiko ever imaginable, it sure is exhausting. Today, I woke up to more disturbing news.

CCP wants to raise rent by 33%!

This is really upsetting the miners.

I just want them to die.

They can pay more to cry more.

I just need 166% more isk to kill double ehp miners.

Every miner is now 33% more likely to quit the game.

I’m gonna win, even if CCP goes bankrupt.

Before you go, send me all your money!

Thanks!

Winning

I’m the best.

Sexist antigankers will never catch me.

They are too busy mansplaining EvE Online.

EvE doesn’t need autistic high-functioning losers lossers.

I’m the witch your mother warned you about.

You might think otherwise.

I don’t care.

I won’t even remember you.

Have fun watching me fuck miners.

You love it.

Cheers!

Glory to Ichinumi! GLORY TO AIKO!

My goodness, I’m busy.

You might yearn for the old days, when loyalanon dunked freighters in Uedama, and Super Perforator roleplayed at Ventures in Poinen. However, the new normal is that 41% of all ganking is Aiko. This is my time, my era. This is the future, and the ganking community is better than ever. Ganking is strong, because I am strong, and I am great, and I am a beautiful Princess in real-life, chaste and pure. Sometimes, I regret that I didn’t call the alliance AIKO, with AIKO as the ticker — but I’m not a narcissist.

Previously, we learned of Auviken, the first system to report more Safety ganks than CODE ganks. We then celebrated Unpas, the first system to endorse Safety as the #1 alltime alliance. Afterward, we heard of Waira, the first system to elect Aiko Danuja as the #1 alltime PvP champion. I am now pleased to present, the first system to simultaneously have Aiko listed as the top pilot of alltime, and Safety as the top alliance. Truly, we are well into a new era, and whilst Halaima might always be a spiritual Mecca, Ichinumi will be forever known as the site of Aiko’s impenetrable inner chamber.

Behold, Ichinumi, bastion of Aikodom. The miners of Ichinumi will always live with dread and fear in their pathetic hearts, for their system is 100% dangerous, and that is no place for a mining simp. If James 315 were alive today, he would give me a hug, and whisper in my ear to tell me how proud he is. We would hold hands, and laugh about all the losers, who failed to be here today. Good job Aiko! Thanks James!

Never Gonna Stop

Some people don’t appreciate our hard work.

They prefer to play with bots.

Well, we can’t please everyone.

Some of them, we don’t even want to please.

However, these miners are begging for attention.

We must keep them SAFE.

They might get frustrated (or abusive), but they need tough love.

Unlike nullsec blobbears, our work is creative and inspiring.

Across the galaxy, people are watching and approving.

EvE Online is the best game, ever!

Battle of Torrinos, Postscript

Previously, we studied the battle of Torrinos, learning how Grand Admiralette Aiko defeated the evil Vast Empire.

We also learned more about the mental muddle, surrounding antiganking loser Everess 88. Princess Aiko wonders, in the third person, whether she goes too far in describing Highsec more ons as autistic reetards. Is this fair? Fortunately, Everess 88 decided to briefly unblock Aiko and fire off a quick clarification, before reblocking our glorious dear leaderess. Presented here, now, for the first time… Everess 88 on Everess 88.

Clarifying his mental afflictions, Everess included a creeper link to a Youtube song. Wow! After some reflection, Her Royal Majesty has linked another Youtube song for Everess to find, when he obsessively reads every word.

This is a friendly reminder to take your meds, always!

The Battle of Torrinos

When I’m not blogging, I sometimes undock.

I recently discovered a vast empire.

In distant Torrinos, the miners are always AFK.

However, they remember my previous visits.

I often cower in a nearby station.

So they sent their best man, HogTits, to camp me down.

He taunted me.

He brought an entire hit squad.

I was in serious trouble.

The miners knew who I was, and they weren’t scared.

I was trapped, and couldn’t escape.

The miners were mocking me.

They even summoned the antiganking main of antiganking loser Everess 88.

That’s the retard goofus who thinks the actual IRL year is 1984. Like wtf.

This was getting serious.

It all happened so fast.

Fortunately, Krig Povelli taught me a magic trick.

Australian Jesus came to my rescue, straight out of Halaima.

Everybody was amazed.

They never anticipated my counterattack.

It was clear who won the battle of Torrinos.

The wouldbe antigankers began to reconsider their choices.

Everess 88’s antiganking main was losing their respect.

The battle was over, and birds began to chirp.

Everybody reflected on the experience.

One thing was crystal clear.

I have a Highsec PvP alt.