Category: Geography

SRP Claim #513-PA

Aiden Vail is a mining man.

Unfortunately, he fell behind on rent.

Consequently, he needs a new ship.

Fortunately, it was Black Friday!

He was a real ice aspirant.

Cool story bro!

Another 2007 newbro.

I naturally established an empathetic rapport.

This is a useful ability.

“The target must succeed on a DC 17 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed. The charmed target regards the vampire as a trusted friend, and is a willing target.”

“Harlots can be both brazen strumpets and haughty courtesans. In addition to the usual fare, the harlot is 15% likely to make something up, and 20% likely to be a thief.

Trust is the basis of every relationship.

Another satisfied customer.

I’m such a good soul.

That’s right.

PRO TIP: Jita has several unique stations!

Somehow, he discovered the blog.

I love to help.

He’s trying to scam me!

I’ve been here before.

It’s just basic math.

Vail asked his new friend for advice.

That’s right.

I explained everything.

That’s the best minigame in EvE Online.

Sad ending…

Life is full of new experiences.

Cheerzah!

Novus Plebbo

Listening to: CASTOLE RADIO

It’s no secret.

We were in CODE, and they weren’t.

They were are mad at James 315.

I call them gankbears.

After James died, it was time to take out the trash.

So we got rid of Hrothgar Nilsson.

However, he made his own alliance, pretending to be us.

Like, for real bro.

James called them ‘former fans’.

[ 2017.03.24 22:58:46 ]
Hrothgar Nilsson > i’m about to go mining.
Hrothgar Nilsson > undocking in my mining ship. gank away.
Hrothgar Nilsson > these are not competing professions
Hrothgar Nilsson > the whole is greater than the sum of its part. Null-sec F1 monkey + agent, or miner + agent, or station trader + agent….. you get better at both by being both
Hrothgar Nilsson > i have successfully baited half a dozen concordokkens

Hrothgar runs a mining alliance.

Sad, but true.

Weird, but true.

So I accepted his challenge.

Doctor Zarkov > i made billions that is just a minoe drawback

AFK carebears aren’t real gankers.

They use their character bio as a blog?

xD

Gankbears just grind for isk.

I PvP for fun.

He didn’t want that pod anyways!

Here’s another Plebbo scout.

GF!

That’s right.

That’s right!

How to Sell a Mining Permit #423

First, chat with a miner.

I like to be direct.

He didn’t take the hint.

Mine around and find out!

PLOT TWIST: That’s just my alt.

So the miner contacted a supervisor…

“No miner can be lawfully ganked unless they are given a full advance warning, with a 60 second truce allowing them to dock up safely.”

No warning, in my Halaima?

He was informed, but ok…

I keep my Highsec safe.

I value my friends.

I love to help.

This is a good racket.

What a great space job.

That’s right.

Read all about it!

That’s right…

Everything according to plan.

Just another day in EvE Online.

Amazing content.

My ‘friend’ never corrected me.

In fact, the little parrot was scamming me.

Everyone loves a free SRP.

They apparently see it coming.

I play the game my way.

This is not my first time.

It adds up.

It works!

=BONUS ROUND=

I almost forgot.

Nobody likes a delinquent miner.

A few moments later…

Another satisfied customer.

=POSTSCRIPT=

Eventually, Andreska bought a new ship…

It never reached the ice.

xD

=THE END=

In the CODE.

Next, they go to Why Was I Ganked?

True story.

Then they get bonus offers.

Another satisfied repeat customer.

He also ordered a new Bowhead.

Of course, there is a delivery fee.

That’s right.

What a happy miner.

Everything was perfectly routine.

He sent me and my alts a bunch of isk.

He even bought a mining stamp.

There’s a process?

What a plan.

Didn’t he already pay?

I’ve done it quite a few times.

PLOT TWIST: There is no file.

DOUBLE PLOT TWIST: No database either.

Jamie is just a working alt.

Nobody likes a space lawyer.

Another delinquent miner.

Eventually, he found me again.

I guess we can resolve this.

Sometimes, they try to negotiate.

I’m happy to explain.

Pleasure doing business…

Jormags wound up mumbling to himself in Jita.

Thanks for playing.

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #248

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #247

Nobody can read it all.

An ocean of salt, decades deep.

In EvE Online, you can be anything you want.

Some people are crybabies.

I’m just a tabloid journalist, in outer space.

I’m also a social worker, and your new high princess (hi there).

By many accounts, I’m the best.

I run a real bad corp.

It’s an intergalactic cartel.

My friends are happy to help.

We go way back.

I’ll see you on the gates.

Cheerzah brav.

Miner Obsession, Part 3

Miner Obsession, Part 1

I try my best.

However, miners get obsessed with me.

\o

o/

Hey there.

Hii.

It’s like love, but not really.

Miners aren’t even capable of love.

Ya kno?

It never really ever stops.

Valryon is a special case.

He is a bad man.

His plan is illegal, in real life.

I tried to talk about EvE Online.

He just kept simping…

haha

What a guy.

This antiganker wants to have sex with me.

Of course, he has competition.

So Valryon needed a plan.

He wants to pimp me out, at FanFest.

He wants to traffick me, in real life.

Fortunately, he won’t will mail me.

How can anyone resist?

No thanks.

That wasn’t the last message.

Ok then.

Meanwhile, in local…

I know what men want from me.

Sometimes, they aren’t even sure what I am.

They don’t seem to care.

I guess there’s an ongoing debate.

Everybody agrees on one thing.

I’m the best…

…and I have simps in EvE Online.

To be continued…

ArchyZavr, Not a Fool

ArchyZavr > fly safe

Rizko spotted him in the morning.

ArchyZavr > Nurds, try it if u can

He had ten thousand PLEX.

Rikzo > ArchyZavr has been here all day trying to get ganked -_-
samy my hero > you just ganna flip it into plex hanger
ArchyZavr > Everyone tells me that you can destroy any ship.Just know that there is a ship in the game that you cannot handle.Until next day 11:PM, I will hang in the gate near Juunigaishi.You can laugh it off as much as you like, but the fact remains that you are not omnipotent.

Nobody wanted the bait.

ArchyZavr > Hahahah. Safety SUCKs
ArchyZavr > ahaha. Noobs
ArchyZavr > I am Immortal Archy,And i never die
ArchyZavr > And safety sucks

Twelve hours later, Archy was still baiting.

ArchyZavr > my ship never die and Safety can’t do anything
ArchyZavr > this ship is too much for safety. I understand.
Razors Vankillsing > have fun then
ArchyZavr > yea, have fun, because safety sucks
ArchyZavr > my ship never die
ArchyZavr > I insulted safety. Will you miss it?)

Are we an good organization or no?

I love new players.

Could I destroy newbro Archy?

Aiko Danuja > I’m doing well if miners openly debate whether or not I am truly ominpotent.
ArchyZavr > )
ArchyZavr > I have already realized that safety will never attack me. Because my ship is invincible. I have never committed suicide or. And if they had committed suicide, there would have been no resentment.
Aiko Danuja > dont do that archy
ArchyZavr > Aiko Danuja I’m not trying anymore.
Aiko Danuja > so you are a weakling
ArchyZavr > OK, let’s do it again: I’m in the Sarekuwa gate to Halaima
Aiko Danuja > ArchyZavr send me 1 billion isk


I’m really good at this game.

Okada Aivoras > Aiko Danuja always has the best ideas
ArchyZavr > If you give your word that you will try to kill the ship, I will give you 1 B, then, if successful, 10 b.If the attempt fails on first try : you will give me 10 b. All the witnesses.p.s. Yes, you can dump me as soon as I transfer 1 billion. But this will only prove my words about weakness safety
Aiko Danuja > very well, i give my word
ArchyZavr > Take 1B. Even if you cheat, I will not regret it – it will give me a lot of joy to know that safety does not keep their word.

Challenge accepted.

Rafa Quinterro > ArchyZavr ill have a crack at that ship
ArchyZavr > Rafa Quinterro on momentos
Jinx Beirut > its a scam, he wont pay after
Rafa Quinterro > you can put the 10bil collateral to Freighty Boi
ArchyZavr > I can’t transfer 10 billion to him because I don’t know him)
Aiko Danuja > ArchyZavr you can trust me
ArchyZavr > I do not u 😀
Aiko Danuja > if you cant trust me, then Freighty Boi is a neutral third party
Rafa Quinterro > bro
Aiko Danuja > ArchyZavr if u want to get this done, let’s go
Rafa Quinterro > put the collateral up
Jinx Beirut > its a classic EvE duel
ArchyZavr > Oh, what a fuss I’ll make on the forums if it’s a hoax)

This is how we play EvE Online.

Okada Aivoras > people pay to be ganked now, things are going the right way
Freighty Boi > that is acceptable
Jinx Beirut > this is gonna be a great fight

…but could we actually gank him?

Was it all a trick?

Archy decided to wait at the sun.

He was a bling pinata.

Archy was a changed man.

Thanks for the free isk, bro.

Now he wanted his protection modules back.

I’m happy to help.

We did him a real favour.

Cheerzah brav!