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Highsec Miner Grab Bag #247

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #246

Oh, hey there.

I guess it’s mailtime.

Some miners are not upset.

They are quite calm.

Some miners roleplay as notaminers.

No mining in Delve!

That’s right.

This Orca had plenty of ‘no’ warning…

It was all a setup! The miner exposed CCP’s evil ways.

I’m the most upvoted person in EvE forum history.

Unlike some people, I actually play EvE Online.

I get way too much email (unlike James, I don’t have a cute secretary).

It is funny tho.

A mining sniper, and not even his first time…

Bro has been doing that longer than I’ve played.

Send me one billion isk, buy 5 get one free.

Boy, I got so much game up in here.

Wow, just wow.

I can’t wait to hear more.

That’s right.

I won’t tolerate griefing in my alliance.

Sure thing, little buddy.

Ah, but I’m also cute.

That’s my isk/hr.

Hey, I’m having fun)

Absolute Manchild

Listening to: Cat Sky Live

Absolute Order has a pro streamer.

Cat Sky is concerned about “gay furry hackers” in EvE Online.

He sure do talk a lot….

…and he’s more than a little salty.

Some people “play the game without paying attention.”

Wow, just wow.

Cat Sky is not an EvE Partner.

Nor is he calm.

What a guy.

He just needs a mining permit.

Cat Sky admits the following IRL offenses:

Grand Theft Auto (multiple counts)
Grand Theft Firearm (multiple counts)
Theft of Motor Vehicle License Plate (multiple counts)
Destruction of Government Property (multiple counts)
Organized Retail Theft (multiple counts)
Assault and Battery (multiple counts)
Terroristic Threats (multiple counts)
Armed Robbery (multiple counts)
Wire Fraud (multiple counts)
Conspiracy (multiple counts)
Solicitation (multiple counts)
Trafficking (multiple counts)
Burglary (multiple counts)
Sedition (multiple counts)
Arson (multiple counts)

He calls us “born worthless skibidi PoS loser toilet goblins.”

However…

We’ve met Cat Sky before.

Here’s his first big movie:

Now he has another banger.

“Piece of shit Reddit toilet bugs
Boiling up out of the skibidi toilet internet
Piece of shit Reddit losers boiling up
Out of the goddamn boring loser internet dregs
Using the only power they got
Little internet keyboard warrior losers”

“You are a fucking skibidi toilet born loser piece of shit ass nobody cares all seven thousand people are trolling you fucking loser ass. I don’t care if you morph into something else, some born loser thing, I don’t care if you do. I’ve had seven idiots like you join the club, nobody cares about your born loser PIECE OF SHIT ASS FUCKING STALKER CYBER BULLY BULLSHIT FUCKING LOSER ASSES THEY ALL KNOW IT ALL SEVEN THOUSAND OF THEM ARE LAUGHING AT YOU… and it’s not some lie, it’s actually like this.”

Cheerzah brav!

=BEHIND THE SCENES=

=FINAL COMMENTS=

Newb Ganking

Hey there.

Highsec miners are not new players.

In EvE Online, I’m the new player.

Highsec miners are bittervet losers.

They are not a space force.

Get wrecked old timer.

Typical!

CCP requires 5, I’d rather use 1.

That’s right.

Astero Wannabe

In EvE Online, carebears are creepbears.

Everything has a price.

There’s only way to respond.

I sent IceyCreeper619 straight to Zboard.

Then I sent a bill, for a bill.

What a neat trick.

Get ganked, miner.

That’s right.

Every miner has a dream.

It’s always nonsense.

Don’t forget to buy your mining permits.

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 51

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 1

There are a lot of alts.

CCP thought these were new players.

Each character imbued with a unique personality.

The primary purpose of the 1000+ alts we applied into MRMNG was to send in-game corp mails.

Our alts adopted various personas. They would surface posing as concerned linemembers, newly promoted corp officers, Agents of the New Order, Metallica enthusiasts, Hapsburg princesses, marine biologists, Ryan Reynolds, chronically ill teenagers, and so on. Over 90000 corp mails were sent over the course of the campaign, which ensured uninterrupted dialogue with the other 2000 members of Mission Ready Mining (aka Fly Fearless).

Meanwhile, New Order agents ensured Safety.

Tunnel Snakes are a menace.

Fly Fearless had a Snake infestation.

Every miner needs help.

They were about to get a lot of Assistance.

However, Safety isn’t free.

Next Time, on Part 52…

Isanamo

Listening to: Shadow Hunter

Oh hi, ya, I live here.

Sort of like a place you might expect me.

This is what GPT says we do.

#1 alltime destroyer/battlecruiser/bomber ALLTIME CHAMPIONS

PewPEWpew – heavy flak from barski

Now that’s REAL PvP.

I’ll add him to the list.

2+8+3=1 Dead Orca

It’s never too late to repent.

They wonder why we gank them…

COMING SOON

In thirteen plus one day…

=THIS SUMMER=

4.91 = 4 + 9 + 1 = 13 + 1

4 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 4 = 13 + 1

We caught a war criminal, in EvE Online.

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #245

Listening to: Zoot Suit Riot

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #244

Miners love to write.

Wow.

What a guy.

Yikesaroo.

I hope they feel better soon.

Miners are always poor…

…and more than a little dim.

Anyways…

At least they are happy.

I know how to have fun.

You love it, daddy-o.

That’s right!

Tell me more?

Fat Cat Came to Play
Now You Can’t Run Fast Enough
You Best Stay Away
When the Pushers Come to Shove
Throw back a bottle of beer
I have coal black hair

Guide to Absolute Victory

Guest Article

Hey, everybody, I’m Gallente Holostar, lead theorycraft design team lead for the Imperium.

Aiko made a map.

There are nine systems of interest: Torrinos, Ibura, Yoma, Oipo, Piak, Elonaya, Onnamon, Uuhulanen, and Uchomida. The miners congregate here and about. We have put a stop to all that, effective immediately. Come join us, as we continue our investigation.

*Facts and Evidence*